Symmetry
by aftrnoondlight
Summary: Love comes slowly when it's the truest. A modern day romance designed and told by Edward.
1. one

**_Symmetry_**

**one.**

**_from Edward_**

"I'm here! Here I am!" Familiar, anxious energy thrust open the car door as my engine idled on. The morning fever and rush filled the street scene around the usual Bella blur of busy. "Thanks, Peter." She fell in, a haphazard pile gathering in her lap. "Oh. Peter, this is my boss, Edward." Angling her head, hands full, she introduced me to the boy with the bicycle loitering still. I reached across with an offered hand. Bella grabbed my wrist quick and tight, fingers tapping over my heavy watch. "See, I'm not late. You're early. Jerk."

"Edward Cullen." He only nodded.

"Good luck today, Bella." She waved her thanks, obviously worried enough to tell someone new. Shifting the mess, she blew loose waves from her face.

"Neighbor?" I wondered, moving her design tubes, leather bag to the back seat.

"Who? Peter? Yeah, he's in the flat above me. Super nice. Just sort of always _there _though… you know? I don't know. He's a psych resident at Rush." Always and as long as I've known her statements end with a questioning tone.

"Well, that might be useful."

"Yes, well, working for you, it might…" She played effortless, primping in the humidity.

"That's right. Your _boss_, Edward Cullen…"

"Should I say my project manager? My mentor? Wait no, my _hero_…" Dripping sarcasm, she smirked, smile growing. "But I am excited. Like really excited about this morning."

"Yeah?" I taunted, her freshman enthusiasm was infectious. "Well, you might need these." I motioned to the rectangular cards on the console between us. Diving in, she gently brushed and flipped and admired.

"Isabella Swan, M-Arch… Garrett Paul Urban Design and Build…" she mouthed, pursing full, naturally glossed lips. "You made these for me?" Lashes batted slightly to amuse.

"Yes. Yes. You're officially big time now."

"I am. I've finally arrived. I'm talented and important and you should promote me."

"I just hired you."

"I know. And thank you for that. I'll be forever grateful… You should take Peppervine and Church instead, to avoid the construction." She pointed, craning and annoyed.

"I like construction. It's kinda what we do." I turned down Peppervine, she tuned to local sports radio.

"Why is it so fucking hot today?" She twisted in the grey leather seat. "It's hot right?"

"Nerves."

"No. I mean a little. But it's like we're having an Indian summer or something. Is that what you call it? Seventies in October? Shit." She rambled as I pulled onto the expressway heading west of the noise. "Maybe I should take off my tights." I glanced, sudden. She was leaning and unbuckling. "I'm an idiot anyway, this looks ridiculous. Tights and open toe t-straps. You should've told me." Reactively, I shifted towards the door, rubbing an anxious thumb over my mouth as her patterned dark blue silk hiked further. "Ok, look that way." She gestured, bossy.

"I'm driving." She arched and struggled, pulling down to bare legs. A side eye peek left endless cream skin. I straightened, grateful for dark shades.

"Oh god, look at this bruise." She smoothed over the purple, shaded mass on her right thigh, laughing. _Jesus Christ._ "Wait, what are _you_ wearing?" Hands tugged at my tan jacket.

"Hey, now." I batted, sneaking another glance at the jagged wound.

"That looks nice. You look nice." _So do you. _Fingertips obliviously smoothed down my pinstripe dress shirt, tongue clicking."I bet Jenn-i-fer bought that. Hmmm?"

"No. It's new, but thanks for ruining my morning. How'd you get that bruise?"

"Oh god. No, no, no I'm sorry. Don't be sad." She pouted, rubbing gently over her thigh again. _Fuck_. "I thought she was so far gone. Edward, seriously, I'm sorry."

"It's fine. I'm kidding. Tell me about that." I pointed, another look.

"Oh. My drafting table. The new one you brought in. Yeah. Well, the corner gets me every fucking time."

"You know those are adjustable, right?" She stared, glared and rolled dark eyes.

"You're a sarcastic asshole sometimes."

"That's no way to talk to your boss."

"But wait are you really still sad?" She twisted, facing, dramatic. "Because you shouldn't be. She was dreadful, completely toxic. And it's been a year, right? I seriously thought you were going to propose last Thanksgiving. You were acting so bizarre. We were all really scared. Remember? She just disrupted the flow." With confident, crossed arms, she sassed on ugly details even I'd forgotten. "And Brett tried to warn you..."

"Brett the relationship expert. He should have his own reality show."

"Well, he and Beth have been together since the seventh grade. I'd say that makes him an expert."

"Christ." We laughed, hovering the console, gliding arms. She casually grabbed my stainless thermos, flipping the lid, sipping slow. The thin silk of her dress gaped over her chest as she fell back against her seat. Deep blue lace edged and peeked.

"Mmmmm. Why so much cream?" She cringed, then eased with an impish grin.

"It's how I like it. But please help your self." She stroked the canister, watching Chicago's urban landscape slip by.

"She doesn't know what she's missing. Look at you. Junior partner now. Swanky silver Audi. Expensive suit. Gorgeous apartment. _With_ original dentil molding. I'd kill for dentil molding."

"When did you get so materialistic? It's not an attractive quality."

"I'm not. You know I'm not! I just love _details_. It's what we do…" She mocked, winking. "I just worry. Don't be lonely. I need all my guys happy and content and loved. It's just a thing for me. You know this." _I do know_. _I was there_. _The loss still soul deep. _

"Hardly lonely. Don't worry about me."

"Yeah? Are there new ladies I should meet? I mean they've always lined up for you." She perked, giggly, I smirked. "Oh. Oh." Her fingers flew over my lips as she adjusted the volume on the radio. "Shhhh! I need to hear what they say about Cutler from yesterday. I got stuck with him on my fantasy team this year."

"Such a girl, you are…"

…_And the Bears finally win at home against Atlanta 30-12. Cutler completed 22 passes for 312 yards and 2 touchdowns. Brian Urlacher in the studio a bit later to discuss the game, so don't go anywhere! You're listening to AM670 All sports, all the time. _

She offered the obnoxious, familiar fist bump.

"Almost there."

"We are? Shit." Suddenly reaching, stretching and angled, her chest brushed my shoulder. "You know I altered the exhibition space dimensions slightly. Right?"

"Yes. I approved and signed off, remember?"

"Ok. Sam Uley. Mr. Sam Uley, director, head curator, blah blah blah… the survey specs… the Quileute library space would allow… sitting approximately… " She whispered, reciting to no one, I beamed amused, impressed. Knees knocked together. "Ok. I'm shaking. This is so stupid." She chewed and hummed. "Renovations aren't my strength, Edward. I like conception. Ground up. From scratch. Fuck, fuck, fuck. "

"What are you even talking about?" I shook, narrowed eyes at her nervous nonsense, pulling in to park. "Hey. Look at me." We breathed, she slowed. Her eager, innocent expression a vague memory of random past firsts. "I've reviewed everything. These clients are easy. They are very grateful and open to ideas. Your preliminary designs are…"

"Tragic? Amateur?" _You're tragically frustrating. _

"What is this new professional insecurity with you? You're usually so full of yourself."

"Ha! I know. I know." She steadied. "I'm a sick study in duality, right? A fucking mess!" Her trembling hands whipped through long, mussed waves, then wildly danced in my face. I grabbed them, holding tight, then gentle. My thumb stroked her palm to soothe.

"I wouldn't let you present if I didn't trust your ability, Bella. My reputation is on the line too."

"Wait! What? Present? Edward!" She shouted, I ignored, smug, unloading and grabbing two bright hard hats. She stalked towards with purpose. "You won't let me talk. Right? You're kidding, aren't you?" I pulled the yellow plastic down tight to her arched brows, knocking twice over the top.

"It's all you, kiddo. Don't blow it." I spun, she trailed, faintly furious and getting psyched.

"Calling me kiddo. You fucker. Oh god. Ok. I will nail this. I will nail this." _I know you will._

**_a/n_**

**_Hello again! Thanks so much for being here and reading. We've missed you xo _**

**_These friends... ffpassion, obsmama and carenl, they're lovely and wise and preread for us xx_**

**_We love our Edwards sweet and our Bellas fun. This trip promises fluffy sugar, hot naughty goodness, and our favorite bittersweet hook. Be sure and read the future peek on Jaime's blog, Fic Fare . _**

**_Please say hi, leave your thoughts, we reply to each and every. More on Monday. xo _**


	2. two

_**two.**_

"Ahhhhh…" Bella pounced, I wrapped her waist to steady. West Taylor Street on Thursday evening was full enough to garner a few stares. The neighborhood was a practical blend of residential and retail, alive with young professionals and students.

"You're crazy." I whispered, suffocating in her hair. "We really need to find an outlet for this energy."

"I mean when he started in about the suspended beams…" She skipped a step, then two ahead. Spinning to speak as her mind raced. "Swear to god, half way, right before lunch, which was really delicious by the way, I was imagining the entire design scope screwed. Just completely fucked. But then… Bam!" She fell serious to mock herself. She climbed a short stair stoop for further dramatic platform. "Mr. Uley, I feel fully confident that the ceiling structure in the main gallery can hold the goddamn boat replicas… Oh and I saw you cringing too." She pointed, playfully accusing.

"Yeah, I think it's really great when you use foul language with the clients."

"He used it first."

"How old are you, again?" Dark eyes narrowed. She paused, retying the deep blue sash at her hip. _. _

"I promise to tone it down next time. You know my mouth has always given me infinite trouble."

"Beginner's mistake. You're extremely passionate about creating. I've been there. I get it." We moved slower, arms looped.

"My wise, patient mentor… Actually, I felt in complete control."

"Until you walked into the knee wall?"

She froze, arms thrown up, head back, roaring, "Thank god it's over! Are we almost to the bar by the way? _The Monkey Drum_… We need to celebrate! I should call my dad."

"_The Drum and Monkey_," I corrected, shrugging out of my tan suit jacket, suddenly too warm. "Another block. You'll like it. It's kinda like Hawkes back home." She grinned suspicious, eyes brightened by lit shop windows. "What?"

"You still call Madison _home_. That's quaint. Very sweet. You're such a mama's boy. How old are you, again?"

"You're such a pain in the ass."

"Is that why you don't take me out to meet people? I really need to make some connections. Professional and _otherwise_…"

I knuckled the top of her head, guiding through the bar's heavy red painted, peeling door. "You've only been in Chicago for what? Two months?" _Two months, four days… _

"And we've been working eighty hour weeks. Just don't be embarrassed of me. Because that would be horrible. Are you? Like an annoying little sister? Or is it because I know all of your secrets? You don't want me drinking and telling, hmmm?"

"Nah, it's okay. I know yours too."

~oo~S~oo~

"Ok, but you can't seriously like Lebron James!" Bella screamed, unecessarily close to our colleague, John.

"And here we go…" I dropped my wallet on the stainless bar, warning John with wide eyes that he was in danger.

"What? Why? He's damn talented...you can't deny that!" Instead he pressed, under the hypnotic spell of her irresistable well-balanced charm.

"But he's a total tool! How can you even get behind that?"

"I like winners… what can I say! Who the hell do you cheer for then?" They challenged louder, I moved out from between. In a conscious sweep of the scene, I surveyed the mix of familiar faces and sports obsessed locals. I barely noticed her imminent approach. She moved along the maple paneled wall with intent. Televisions blared games and scores, tuning out the live basketball debate on my left. I grinned through quiet, smug greetings.

"How've you been, Maria?" Her appeal wasn't lost, but the flirt was tiring.

"You were going to call." I reactively glanced, Bella's mouth hovered the tip of her amber beer bottle, gaze locked, on pause.

"I've been slammed managing this museum project." I gestured towards Bella. "We've been working non-stop."

"Ah." Maria nodded, murderously straight, dark hair shadowed her disappointment. "Well, we got the new condo project here in University Village. So I've been working like mad too."

"Oh. That's a big coup. Congratulations."

"Thanks. So when you're free _again,_ we should talk shop... eat, drink or _something_." She leaned, lips skimmed my cheek, ear, heady scent strong. Her proximity reminded of several sleepless nights together. "I miss you." She sipped her wine slow, fingers grazing my chest, tugging the buttons softly, suggestively. "She's cute, by the way." I caught Maria's hand, as Bella stiffened through a noticeably audible exhale**. **"Seriously, call me… soon**, **Edward**.**" Pink painted lips dusted near my jaw again, before disappearing.

"Come on, John. Ray Allen is a ten time all-star, he's sitting on more accolades than James will ever even deserve, and he's the NBA all-time leader in three-point field goals made. You've got to admit he's worth supporting. Plus, look what he does off the court."

"Jesus, Edward, where'd you find this one?" He laughed, toasting. "Listen up, he also holds the record for three-point field goals attempted… and Lebron James _broke_ Ray Allen's record for most consecutive points in a game so that automatically makes him superior." Her scowl led a rush of Swan family memories. I waved the bartenders attention.

"Are you serious? That's your focus?" Bella was soulless in sports, forever her father's daughter.

"Two more Spotted Cows," I ordered.

"How about the next time Lebron is in town, I'll take you to a game, then you'll see why he's so revered?" _Fuck you, John. Shit._ I turned and tensed, as his eyes traveled her body down, then up again.

I offered her the beer, intentionally lingering to brush hands. _I'm here._

"So, how long have you two known each other?" John flexed beneath a grey company logoed polo.

"Birth."

"Her birth," I corrected.

"Right, he and Brett were in the third grade. He's my brother Brett's best friend. Say that three times fast… Ha!" She knocked back her second, breathing deep. Sweeping her long hair into a loose, lazy knot, she rocked in the dark barstool. "He actually bought me my _first_ Spotted Cow… the elixir of life." We nodded, goofy grins, old and ours. "When I was what, Edward? Sixteen?" _Eighteen. _

"Whoa. Where'd you win that?" His calloused thumb grazed the decades old scar barely beneath her left ear. _Don't touch, man. _

"Oh. Well… ever the tag along… see Ben's the oldest, then Brett and our token brother, Edward, and Emmett… the baby, well he's seventeen now. I mean he's not part of this story, but…" She rambled, John stared. "These guys were climbing to their uber stupid, secret hideaway, which was basically a bunch of old two by fours in our oak tree. I was at the bottom, on the ground…"

"Yelling profanities…"

"Shut the hell up! Let me tell this. Anyway, they got spooked by a teeny, tiny baby cardinal in the tree and the clumsy goons fell like dominoes all the way down the trunk piling onto me. I was impaled, literally stabbed with a branch they brought down."

"More like a twig."

"So you two go way back. Sounds like borderline nepotism." Bella faded, he'd hit the line. His perpetual bullshit was rubbing me too.

"She knows her shit, John. You'll see, this project will be in your phase soon. She's worked up quite the progressive plan. Hopefully your guys are up to the challenge. Bella's relentless with details." _Brilliant, actually. _

"You know, I almost majored in Construction Management. My dad's in construction, Brett too. But this guy, he's quite the influence. Calling me constantly at school, reminding me to _explore my artistic side_. Such a dreamer, he is." She trailed, thoughts past. Her fingers fell over mine, brief, warm, tugging light.

"Well, I'm looking forward to seeing what you've got." _Fuck you._ Done indulging, I straightened, squaring protective.

"You ready? It's been a long day."

"I can take her."

"I've got it." _Back the fuck off. She's with me._

~oo~S~oo~

The short trip to her four story building wasn't our ordinary comfort. We rode odd, quiet. Her spirit seemingly spent, she watched my hands mindlessly over the wheel. "What was that ridiculous dick size competition?"

I choked. "What? What the hell are you talking about?

"You know what. That was disgusting. Seriously." I shrugged. "You can't be that way anymore, you know? We weren't hanging out in a college bar on summer break."

"What way is that, Bella?"

"Stop it. You can't go around puffing up every time I talk to a grown man. Did Brett tell you to head off my fun? You guys are so predictable. This is why I'm still fucking single! And you're off drooling over that woman with the best fucking hair ever. Which by the way, I need to hear the dirty deets sometime. But not now, because it's not fair and I'm really fucking… frustrated," she trailed, mumbling. "In more ways than one." _Oh. Join the fucking club. _"But seriously, what does she do? I mean, I'm just curious."

"She owns a small landscape architecture firm."

"Owns it?"

"Yes. Why?"

"I don't know... she just didn't seem..."

"Wow. Listen to you. This is rare. Usually it's all girl power, solidarity with you." _Interesting._

She pumped her fist, mumbling. "Go girl... with your great fucking hair!"

"Bella, listen, John Dowling has a pretty significant position at Garrett Paul. You're going to be working with him closely _and_ often. He needs to respect the situation... and so do you."

"Thanks, buddy, I really appreciate the trust. He's not my type, anyway. He likes Lebron James." She shuddered, dramatic.

"Hey..."

"Hey," she mocked, easing slightly with a twisted grin. Edging the curb, I killed the engine and we both unbuckled.

"What the hell time is it, anyway? I'm done arguing with you."

"Are you hungry? I can feed you."

"I'm tired."

"I'll walk you up."

"I'm a big girl now, you know. Do we need to cover that part again?" _I'm totally aware_. We paused, staring. "I don't mean to be such a bitch, I'm sorry. I don't want to ruin the day. Today was good."

"_You_ were good."

"Thank you. For all of this. _All_… of it." Melting into the seat, sinking lower, sighing deep… "This is exactly how I imagined our…" She rubbed sleepy eyes. "I mean…it's how I imagined all _the_ days to be. And I love it, I love everything. It's truly like this fast paced urban fantasy I always had. You know… leaving home, away from Madison, then the university and my brothers and Dad and just living and exploring and designing. And now it's real and I'm here and I get to do it because _you_ took a chance on me." Her lips quickly met my cheek, a rote, fleeting kiss, yet the moment slowed as she fell away. "Thank you, Edward."

"No problem." _I can't imagine you not here… _She nodded, moving through the door, shoes, leather bag, design tubes in fumbling.

"Ok then."

"Ok."

~oo~S~oo~

_Firm thighs straddled, my hips rocked ready against her warmth. I spread her further as she moved over me, deeper by every thrust. Her needy strong fingers sought my chest, desperate for leverage as I fucked harder. The darkest, straightest hair fell forward masking her face as I gripped her smooth hips. Harder, faster…begging dirty, louder…. So goddamn close now… Incredible… Maria always felt incredible._

_She moaned sweet, as I flipped us over, arms bracing on either side. Her hands gently grasped the dark iron headboard, as I slid. Her legs wrapped slow, she met my thrusts, as I captured a nipple. Teeth teased the taut peak, she whimpered faint, breathless, nearing the edge. I focused on the silky light waves spilled over the pale sage sheets… I skimmed, wet, parted lips up and over the creamy smooth skin of her neck, finally tasting tender the tiny, familiar scar at the base of her ear… _ _"Mmmm, Edward…"_

"What the fuck!" My cell menaced, my cock throbbed, my heart exploded. "Fuck. No. No. No…" I stroked, anxious to breathe steady, wanting to finish, needing to finish, my head spun and the ringing forced on. "Hello!"

"Hi you, it's me. I'm early and already downstairs. It's raining, but I do have blueberry bagels. And yes, I walked, so be proud. Hey, why are _you_ so out of breath?" _Jesus. Bella._ "Helloooo... Edward..."

**_a/n _**

**_Thank you so much for reading and being here. Your notes last week were the absolute best xo _**

**_Huge hugs to the ladies that keep us true, obsmama, ffpassion, and carenl. Love you xx _**

**_Sweetest thanks to twilover76, who writes pretty words and supports big xo _**

**_Tell us everything... we love to hear from you :) Have a wonderful week xoxo_ **


	3. three

_**three.** _

"Mr. Cullen… lunch is served."

"Great, thanks."

"Pastrami on Rye, oil and vinegar, extra onions, no cheese."

"That's me."

"Aren't you from Wisconsin? No cheese, really?" Angela joked, handing over the white paper bag and drink.

"Yeah…Hey, how's your son doing?"

"Better, thank you. Oh, Beth Swan's on line three. I got confused for a minute."

"It's Bella's sister in law."

"Gotcha. Bella did call about ten minutes ago, she's on her way, she got lost on the Southside."

"What? What's she doing down there?"

"Meeting, maybe?"

"Can you tell her I need to see her when gets here? Thanks." I quickly picked up the phone on my desk.

"Bethie!"

"Hello, you… Mr. Big Shot. Too busy to RSVP to a silly little baby shower for your future godchild back home, I get it."

"Ahhhh. Shit. I'm sorry. Of course, I'll be there. You know that."

"Okay, okay… I figured. You need someone to keep your social life situated."

"I have no social life, Beth. None."

"You've got Bella down there now. Must be like old times, huh?"

"Yeah something like that."

"Brett and Charlie still worry about her like crazy. It's ridiculous. She's a grown woman now. I'm seriously so proud of her."

"Well, the worry's warranted, she can be a handful… Hey, talk about grown ups… are you guys all set? What do you need? I guess I should go shopping for this party."

"We're good. We just miss you guys. The shower's an excuse to get you back home for a few days, you know."

"Fuck Beth, where did the time go? You guys are having an actual baby… I can remember Brett talking about…"

"Stop it! God. I don't like thinking about the things you know. We're not getting any younger. You'd better get busy and catch up. How's the outlook?"

"Dim. Dark. Basically, pitch black."

"Oh, please. I doubt that. Bella was just telling Brett this morning about some beautiful Maria woman at your apartment." _What? No. Fuck. She was not at my apartment. _

"No, no… no Maria. That was just a thing over the summer. Post Jennifer… really just a thing. That's all. And I don't know why she thought that."

"She called early, lost and pissed or something, Bella style. God, I miss her messes. Sometimes. But, yeah, I don't know… Brett talked her all the way to the train. Anyway… " _Where were you…_ "You guys should try to come up Friday for Emmett's game. It would make Charlie's life to have everyone there. Oh, that reminds me, I saw your mom yesterday. She was working at the St. James pumpkin patch."

"Yeah, that's her annual gig. She likes being with the kids."

"She looked great. Big smile. It was perfect."

"Thanks, Beth. It's good to hear… Alright, we'll see you in a couple of weeks, then. Tell Brett to get on the horn. It's been like four days or something."

"Oh, god… you two. You would think after knowing each other as long as you have, you could go a few days without talking and checking in. You're like gossipy old women sometimes. I'll let him know you're expecting a call from him soon. Hug Bella, please."

"Will do. Bye, Beth." _Why the hell were you on the Southside of fucking Chicago alone on a Friday morning? _

"What?" Bella shrugged, hip cocked, brow arched, sudden and present in my office. Her hair hung limp and damp down her back.

"Where've you been?" I stood, she scoffed. "Just decided to loiter in the dangerous hoods of Chicago? Please, enlighten me."

"First of all, change your damn tone... "

"Bella, knock it off. Where were you? I've been… worried."

"Yeah? Well, I'd be more worried about your cell phone service, since it's so fucking shady and just loses connection so randomly. I'd also be worried about your heart's reputation since it's so full of hot… sexy, ugh… all nighters and can't seem to remember the fulfillment of giving back selflessly to society." I gripped the ends of my hair in eye rolling exasperation.

"What in the fuck are you talking about? Goddammit!" I tensed, she flinched and narrowed her eyes, ready.

"Coven House, Edward. I was at the Coven House board meeting. And you promised. You promised to do this with me. For my mom, Edward. We were going to do this together."

"Oh, fuck, Bella. I'm sorry."

"You and me… remember…" _I do, I remember…_

_She wore Brett's old green jersey over another. The whistle sent her running from one group of eight girls to another. I stretched my legs from the seemingly smaller wooden bleachers in the St. James gym and tugged anxiously through my hair. The indescribable pit and pain in my stomach waged on as I checked my watch. Concentrating on a monotonous dribble drill, Bella rounded the orange cone, dusting damp, thick bangs to the side. She stilled suddenly, the ball fell away. We stared, I grinned and motioned. Moving closer, arms crossed and guarded, the tears in her wide, brown eyes spilled silent, easy. _

"_Did she die?" _

"_Bella…" _

"_That's why you're here, right? My dad sent you. Because she died today." I knelt within a whisper. _

"_We're going to go to my house for a while, kiddo." My hand was light over her trembling shoulder. "My mom has Emmett there with her.. We can swim in the pool if you want." She nodded, kicking paver rocks, trailing me to my jeep. "You wanna ride shotgun?" _

"_I'm not allowed." She breathed, sizing up my faded duffle spilling trainers and Calculus notes onto the front seat. _

"_Can you just say… please, Edward." I paused, dropping the heavy ring of keys in my lap. Lost on how to comfort, my dad was alive when he left. I gingerly laid my hand over the top of her head, then told the worst truth, forever becoming an accomplice in her small life's darkest moment. Drifting in on a sunny August afternoon and ripping the grounding light from all she knew. _

"_Can we go the long way?" _

_I slowed, watching as she worked hard to manually roll down the window. _

"_Regent Street. Can we drive down Regent Street?" She leaned, whole and calm, from shoulders up outside the window. The brightest summer sun punctuated her freckles, the warm wind blew her ponytail free. I drove the long way, slower by the mile, letting it sink. Months past, there was no sign of an accident, only new season growth. _

_She suddenly fell in, tugging her jersey right, cheeks pink and tear stained. "I hope your mom made goulash." I laughed light, settling. _

"_Bella Swan, I'm pretty sure you're the only person on the planet who likes my mom's goulash." _

"_Really? That's cool." _

"_It is cool. Makes her feel good. And that's a good thing." _

"_Yeah." _

"I got lost," she whispered harsh, pushing by me.

"I heard."

"From who?"

"Beth. She called about the baby shower. And she also told me you thought I had Maria over."

"Yeah… well… you were out of breath and fucking hung up on me and she's gorgeous and so are… I figured it's just not shit you wanted me to know. So I went on to the meeting thinking you'd just meet me there. I mean… I know I can't depend on you forever. Being there. So…" _I never want to disappoint you._

"You _can_ depend on me..."

"So… was she there?"

"No."

"Well, then what was…"

"Please drop it. I'm so fucking sorry about this morning. My head was a disaster. You know I meant to be there with you." Her shoulders relaxed slightly, she wiggled in her tall heeled leather boots.

"This group is amazing. Their long term vision is totally attainable, Edward. Something I can completely wrap my entire mind and soul around. I'm serious. My mom would have been so pleased. Like really impressed. You know it's definitely a bigger deal than what she ran in Madison, right? I mean… they're planning entire urban blocks of these affordable family homes. Just… pure community love."

"It's a great set up. It really is. I've been working with them for almost five years now."

"I didn't know… wow." She trailed. "The energy is just so inspiring. You need energy. You need something. I'm so pissed at you right now." She rambled, hopping onto my desk as I fell, deep tilt in my chair again. "Everyone of course asked about you."

"Yeah? How'd you explain? What lies did you dole?"

"That they should judge you harshly and veto every brilliant suggestion you make."

"Sounds about right." The pearl buttons on her black wool shirtdress pulled slightly as she crossed her legs. She tore into the butcher paper sandwich wrapping.

"What the hell with all these onions, Edward? Disgusting." Mouthful, cringing and cute, she bitched and spilled. Onions flung and left in a heap.

"Help yourself. Please."

"And what is this?" She sipped, wincing.

"Black tea. Mango black tea. It has lots of antioxidants for old people like me."

"But it's sweetened with sugar?" I nodded. "So you understand that pretty much defeats the purpose? And what's with the mango in October?"

"Right. Whatever. I like it and I'm going to need something stiffer if you continue this torture. And you're supposed to affirm that thirty two isn't old, by the way."

"You deserve it. You abandoned me… Oh, but there was one potentially exciting happening that could turn my frown upside down and might forgive your complete and utter failure."

"I can't even imagine." The sole of her boot tapped relentless against my knee. She uncrossed her legs, oblivious to my view which reactively slid higher. _Fuck_. More lace, light and cream, peeked from between her legs and darker cream trimmed her thighs. _Jesus Christ._

I clenched the crease of my grey dress pants, ever wanting to run my fingers along and up her silk instead. She edged the corners of her mouth, wet with oil and vinegar. She swiped over her bottom lip, a new and easy giggle in the mood shift. "So… you didn't tell me about Alec Meyer…" _Shit._

"Alec? You met Alec, did you? I suppose you would."

"Yes. Yes, I did." She smirked, wicked. "He took me in, gave me shelter from the rain and ate your bagel."

"Is that supposed to be funny?"

"Yes. Maybe... I don't know but, thank god you were a horrible human being this morning and forgot about me and the meeting…" _I never forget you._ "Because… I could relax and get my flirt on, without your hovering." She winked. I ran hands furiously over my face.

"Bella, come on."

"What?" She squared, frustrated.

"I thought you were there to volunteer, be inspired… give back?"

"Stop. That's not fair."

"You know I've known him since my program at Notre Dame."

"Good for you."

"I mean if his college days were any indication…"

"Goddammit. Whatever. He's super nice and gracious and interesting and ridiculously accomplished. He's president of a non-profit… And… he invited me out for drinks."

"Of course he did." I righted, tense and flexed.

"Don't be a jerk... I get to date people."

"Right," I mumbled, moving to the drafting table. "Oh, I realized this morning, while you were out picking up older men, that your scale is off on this corner feature in the Quiluete library."

She dug in, knowing. "I'll look at in Monday. I'm leaving."

"For the day?"

"I'm done here."

"Really…"

"Yes. You're…"

"What? What am I? What am I now? Today? Hmmm?"

"Why are you doing this?"

"Doing what? Caring about you?"

"That's not what this feels like, Edward."

_I grabbed the last bottle from the caterer's white lacquered tub and staggered toward the water. Popping the top few buttons of my tuxedo shirt, I grinned lazy and nodded. _

"_Are you feeling better or hiding from all the romance?" _

"_Come hammock with me." _

"_Is hammock a verb now? Is that what all the college cool kids are saying?" _

"_Shut up. I'm sad, rock with me." She shifted, I twisted and fell opposite over the sturdy white ropes. _

"_Okay… so sad and bossy." _

"_I can't believe my brother just got married. It's crazy. I always figured Ben would be first." _

"_He's got other priorities. But Brett and Beth… they give me hope." _

"_You want that? Really? That's surprising coming from you." _

"_Sure. You don't?" She reached for my bottle, sliding her tongue around the glass top, then sipping small. _

"_I'm eighteen and hopeless." _

"_No way. You're terrific." _

"_Can you tell Tyler that?" _

"_That punk?" I scoffed. "His loss." _

"_It's not, Edward. I miss him." _

"_Well, a wedding isn't exactly the best place to heal a broken heart, kiddo. And I know you miss him, because you were crying at four in the morning." _

"_Yeah, sorry about that. But thanks for answering. Brett didn't." _

"_Ahhh, I see, I'm second in command." I knocked her knees with mine. _

"_He better be missing me." _

"_Who wouldn't? You're the epitome of everything amazing in a woman." _

"_Are you drunk? How much is Brett paying you?" _

"_I mean it. I really do. You're good people, Bella Swan." _

"_He was everything…" _

"_Everything. Everything?" _

"_Yes. Oh god… okay this is awkward."_

"_Probably more awkward for me." _

"_I just want the feeling to end. This like gutting misery." So age appropriately dramatic, she closed her eyes and groaned, her teal painted toes pinched the knotted rope beneath... _

"_The misery will help you grow. These guys you date aren't going to change until they're out of school and responsible for their own groceries and shit. Trust me. You should be out having fun. Having lots of sex. You don't get these years back." She suddenly sat up, wide eyed. _

"_Brett definitely isn't paying you." _

"_I mean you need to be careful…" I pointed, she tugged and twisted 'til it hurt. _

"_Okay, Jesus. I'm embarrassed. But you're so real, Edward. That's rare amongst dudes." She crawled casual, tucking in close. We focused on the same setting sun listening to the waning celebration up the hill behind us. "Maybe I'll meet someone like you next semester." _

"_Nah…" _

"_You're the total package in a guy. Seriously. That's why all my friends had huge crushes on you." _

"_Yeah, I suppose I am the ultimate catch." Her elbow met my ribs. _

"_Thanks for always listening, man." _

"_Are we having a moment?" _

"_Totally. This is a serious business moment. I won't forget the night you gave me permission to go have lots of sex…" _

~oo~S~oo~

My knocking increased the higher, louder she sang. Anxiously gripping the fluted, grey painted molding around her door, I stared at the scuffed tips of my dress shoes. I needed a shoe shine. I needed a whiskey. I needed a life. _Fuck. Bella, open the door. _

"Hi."

"Hi." We stared. Smoothing and straightening a short olive dress, her hands gripped the leather tie tight at her waist. "You changed."

"I'm just heading out." Her cool tone was unforgiving. She leaned toward the small side table, filling a light leather clutch with essentials.

"Where? Where are you going?"

"I told you, drinks… with Alec Meyer."

"Tonight? Now?" My tone stabbed with jealousy, I tightened, narrowing eyes at her. She breathed to steady, scowling, giving as good as she had. An amazing intensity, ever present in my life, had finally evolved.

"Yes, Edward. Tonight. I'm meeting him for drinks a few blocks up at a new jazz bar."

"You don't like jazz."

"I know that. I'm just... making an effort." She sighed, licking her lips, frustrated. "What do you want?" I stepped closer, my heart warring with my head. "Tell me what you want."

"Fuck, Bella… don't go." I pressed, trapping her gently against the wall behind. Slowly sliding my hands to the base of her neck, I grazed my thumbs across her blushed cheeks. Soothing desperate as she stiffened. She reactively grasped forward, her fists twisted my shirt to balance. "Please, don't go tonight." I met her forehead with mine, breathing in her subtle perfumed scent. She shook, a slight fight and will to understand. "Shhh…" I tangled through the waves at her nape. My thumb slid across her rose glossed lips.

"Edward…" Heady confusion, a sensual lilt laced her voice. _Ask me, beg me… whisper soft. I want things from you I can't explain. _She released my shirt, spreading trembling fingers over my abdomen, touching new.

I tenderly held through her hair, pulling closer, leaning in, mouths hovered, breath shared.

"Stay here… with me."

Nails dug, eyes fluttered closed, a faint gasp startled. My lips fell firm, hers parted under mine. Tongues tentative, exploring slow, I pressed tighter, sliding my knee between her weakening legs. We hit the wall, she stiffened again, closing her legs around mine. We stilled.

I shifted, my painfully hard cock against her, she whimpered, pulling me ever closer. Breathless and on, I tugged easy on her hair, to trail wet down her jaw. _You're so fucking soft... _The dip and drape of her dress leaving her throat and chest bare. "You're so beautiful," I whisper, tasting over her skin. "Bella, fuck. I want this… I want everything with you…"

She loosened as I neared her neck again, her hands forced between against my chest. Pushing, harder off and away, she breathed deep as I straightened from the heat. I fell back along the opposite wall, rattling a frame above me. My day old stubble marred her creamy skin, her fingers ran down her neck, up over her swollen lips, retracing.

"What… what is this…" She tilted her head and rolled it away and back against the wall, her eyes closed, undoubtedly replaying the last minutes on a loop. "No… no, no, no." Her eyes widened, locked on mine. I began, she stopped. "No, Edward. You don't get to come here, raging jealous if that's even what you fucking are right now and come at me with… this. And expect me to change my plans… or my mind… I don't…"

"Bella… listen…"

"I don't understand… this. Please go. I… I have a date. I have to go. I need you to leave. I can't do this with you right now."

Unsteady steps towards the door, she opened, shaking. I watched, taking in the stubborn set and stance. White knuckles punished the door's edge, as she stared simple, lost in the black varnished floor. I paused. Cupping her warm face firm, she melted barely into my palm. "I'm not giving up..."

_**a/n**_

_**Thank you sweet friends for reading xx **_

_**Thank you to the best, obsmama, ffpassion and carenl. So much love xo **_

_**Our beautiful, talented friend VampsHaveLaws writes heartache, love so pretty, and inspires us. Love you girly xx**_

_**He went for it. How do you feel? How does Bella feel... She'll tell us in the chapter ;) **_

_**Love you guys XO **_


	4. four

**_four. _**

**_from Bella_**

"You like jazz, right?"

"Oh, yeah, absolutely. I love it. Jazz is just… yeah. " _No. Not at all._ I beamed bright at Alec, he shifted closer. Our small square table bordered the stage, leaving a challenge to chat. But I pressed on, determined. "I mean these guys are fantastic. What's the band's name?"

"Aro."

"Arrow?"

"No, Aro," he shouted near. His blue dress shirt was unbuttoned one too many. The waitress dropped off our drinks and offered a menu. I sipped, he ordered scallops and stared.

"You look great tonight." _"You're so beautiful… Bella, fuck. I want this… I want everything with you…" Get out of my head, you impulsive, jealous, perfect man._

"What's that?" I shook myself present, attempting pleasant. "No, god, thank you. I'm sorry, Alec, I'm all over the place tonight. My head is… it's just everywhere." I gestured wild, pinching my eyes tight. _Simmer down. _I took in the overwrought gold and purple aesthetic, immediately switching up the color scheme in my mind. Anything to avoid getting lost in there or in the sexy madness of thirty minutes prior.

"I remember being fresh and young in a new city. It's exciting. Good times." _Fresh and young, that's me, with the agonizing confusion of a lifetime crush spinning my heart sick. Dramatic, party of one. _"New names, places, professional this, that… fuck. It's a lot to absorb."

"I'm keeping up. I've got good people around me." _And you know, pinning me against my foyer wall._

"So, you come by way of Edward Cullen, hmmm?" His mouth lingered over the rim of his highball, eyeing curious. Edward was ever the intersection my life.

"Yes, yes, you could say that. He brought me to Chicago, and to Garrett Paul. I mean we've been friends forever. He's been a huge influence on… well... basically everything."

"_Do you think they do it?" Janey poked my frozen leg with the green metal shovel. Masked by enormous December drifts, we spied. _

"_Do what?" I snarked, avoiding the ugly truth. _

"_Have sex, stupid. Like moan and groan... have sex." We watched Edward nuzzle his latest college snow bunny against the kitchen counter. His hands strong and tight at her waist and back. She giggled, as he pushed her bleached hair behind her shoulder. His mouth moved slow near her ear, she nodded and licked her bright painted lips. Slut. _

"_Yeah. They're screwing for sure." I pouted, scraping my shovel hard against the aging brick driveway. _

"_Can you even imagine kissing Edward Cullen? Jessica from next door, you know her older sister said he's like a town legend," Janey laughed, wide eyed. _

"_Legend in what?" I pushed my blue knit glove across my cheek and glanced through the glass again. There wasn't a breathe between them, they rocked and held and laughed and flirted. "Like his kissing is legendary or what?" _

_Janey tore off her mitten and wiggled her fingers, nodding. "No, these." _

"_Gross." Wow, damn. _

"_I'd kiss your brother," she stomped, and squealed as Brett suddenly pressed his goofy mug against the window. _

"_Punk!" I shouted, launching a round, icy missile of snow. _

"_Brett's hot, Bella. Sorry." _

"_Janey, you need glasses and a brain scan." _

"Cullen's sharp. He stole my very first bid right out from under me. Did he tell you about that? I got cocky, careless, and he sweeps in… he's got this eager modern edge with his designs, you know? This was for the ultra conservative Historical Society, no less. But he still knocked them on their asses and left them starry eyed in his wake." _ I can relate. _"Word on the street is he's sitting on the top prize in…" The microphone screeched above, we cringed. "… but he's not spilling, and I can't imagine going that far, so I don't know if it's true or not. But he's definitely on the rise."

"What? I'm sorry…"

"Nothing. Just shop talk. You wanna go for a walk?" He grinned, reaching. "Go somewhere else? I'm realizing this was a bad choice for getting to know you." I stilled, completely conscious of the walk I truly wanted to take.

"Can we compromise with a phone call. Maybe next week?" I was beginning to understand Edward's constant warning of the personal-professional tightrope.

~oo~S~oo~

"Corner of Pace and Jasper, please." I welcomed the warmth of the taxi, slumping sloppy against the filthy cracked seat. "It's the corner building. Four story. Stacked flats. Empty. Small."

"What, Miss?"

"Nothing. I'm just… it's nothing… Pace and Jasper."

"_Okay, everyone's totally passed out. Gimme that." I adjusted the almost rude length of my red cotton shorts, standing in front of Edward's lazy late night couch position. _

"_No way. It's my remote. I'm in the middle of a movie." Edward narrowed tired eyes, holding the television remote high. _

"_What movie is more important than Sports Center at this hour?" _

"_That shit is on repeat, please. You already watched it once at eleven." He emptied another Spotted Cow bottle, smirking. I dove, knees digging, hands reaching. He was fast, impressive given the hour and alcohol. _

"_Come on..." One last stretch and I landed in his lap. We hushed each other silly, fear of waking Brett and Ben and Beth and the dead. "You're an asshole." _

"_Am I? After this amazing surprise party, I'm an asshole?" He whispered, close. _

"_No. No, you're not really. You're actually pretty amazing too." I melted lower, the remote tumbled to the floor. _

"_So, Bella Swan is finally twenty one." He swept soft fingers across my forehead, tucking stray hair behind my ear. Fuck. I breathed, digging sharp nails in my palm to confirm reality. "Did you have a happy birthday?"_

"_Yes. So happy…" I slid my hand down, over and up his chest. His mouth parted at my touch. Grasping the back of his neck, I suddenly pulled him closer. Soft lips brushed over, lingering then back slightly. His hair fell easy over his forehead, faintly shading his surprise. _

_Please, dear fairy of good fucking wishes don't let Brett wake up. Please, please, please. _

_I leaned, pressing against his mouth again, gentle to test, then not so much. I swept over his lower lip, he wrapped, gripping my waist to pull me in without hesitation. The kiss deepened, tongues tangled, mouths parting only to breathe desperate. Hands roamed, fevered down and further. Oh my god. There. Please right there. "Wait. Wait. Wait. Bella." We fell apart. _

"_Oh my god. Edward. I'm so…" Horny. "Sorry. I'm so, so sorry. I've obviously lost my mind. Shot and gone. Too much to drink for newly legal me. Please don't say anything." I buried in my hands, drawing my knees under. _

"_No, no. It was me. But goddamn, Bella. You're…" _

"Crazy. I'm crazy. I've lost my mind. Sir…" I banged, shouting. "Sir. I'm sorry, I need 3740 Reed Avenue North."

"You said Pace and Jasper. Now Reed North?" His hands flew frustrated.

"No, wait! Can you just stop for a second. Pull over here. Let me process... I need to think." I shook, slamming my head against the chilled window. "Edward... you hypocritical, sexy son of a bitch."

"Miss... are you alright?" The driver straighted, turning to stare strange at my mixed up misery. "Don't get sick in my cab. That's extra."

"I do... I _do_ feel sick. I'm a lovesick idiot. This is ridiculous. He wants me. I want him. But he's _him_. And it's wrong a hundred ways to Sunday. And he kissed me and said it all. And my mouth still stings in the best way. And I shouldn't do this. He's my boss now for the love of god.

"Oh, that's never good," the driver nodded, pulling his worn Cubs cap off.

"I know. See... Right? You know. But he's... he's... _Edward_." I trailed. "3740 Reed Avenue North," I demanded, clapping my hands together.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. I mean, I shouldn't. But I won't be able to sleep if I don't." _And hopefully I won't sleep if I do._.. I smiled, anxiously timid, excited, thighs tight together. "Onwards. Reed Avenue North! And you're absolutely lovely by the way." He mumbled gruff in response as I counted extra in my wallet for his patience.

I took the stairs by twos, heels aching. I unzipped and carried my boots in the well halfway. The black figure eight over his door was lit only by the faint moon through the hall end window. I tapped, then knocked, anxiously knotting my day old waves. I heard the shuffle, felt the pause, my thumb covered the peephole. Ha!

"Bella." He held the door, head bent tired, staring down at our both bare feet. Gripping and rubbing hard over the back of his neck, he sighed, blowing deep.

"Hey. Don't do that. Don't huff. I'm here… even after that stunt you pulled tonight." One corner lamp glowed over and through the deep coffee colored walls of his living room. "I'm here."

"How was your date?" I swayed in casual. The dark leather couch was cool beneath my overheated self. His stare followed the length of my bare legs as I settled back. "What are you doing?"

"My feet are killing me." He leaned, suspiciously sizing me up.

"Did you dance? Because you can't dance and shouldn't try in public."

"That's not very nice." I glared, stalking towards him again. He tensed. "I'm the one had to endure the most passionate kiss to end passionate kisses then listen to a grown man drool over your design work like a jealous small cocked fraternity boy." I sensed a hint of my favorite smile.

"Did he?"

"Yep." I clicked and popped, dramatic.

"We should talk, Bella."

I skimmed across, down his back, dragging fingers to edge his cotton sleep pants. A new touch, slow and brave. "We should, probably."

"Yeah, we definitely should…" He whispered, trailing. I followed the long, lean lines, then palms flat against his naked back. Smoothing over his warm skin, his stiff flex dissipated slightly. I smirked, tracing the faint freckle at the top of his shoulder. Soft fingers along the angle of his jaw, he shivered. Closer, we stared.

"Kiss me."

Tentative hands rested at my throat, want raced through my body, chasing away the chill. His touch was tender, softer than before.

His thumbs slid over sensitive skin. Teasing down over my jaw, neck, he cupped my cheeks and watched my mouth. His tongue slid across his full lower lip as my hands drifted up his chest. I twisted through the hair on his chest then below. High on tip toes, our mouths barely hovered.

His hands buried in my hair, tugging it loose, as he let out the breath he was holding. "But you're pissed at me. I don't want to have angry sex."

"We're going to have sex?" I smirked to tease and lighten. A heartbeat passed, our lips met, soft. I whimpered as we explored. "I'm not pissed... not anymore. Take me."

He gently stroked my cheek as we parted to breathe. Tilting, he traced the slope of my jaw with his tongue, nipping light, then blowing over wet skin. I eagerly tugged the tie at his waist.

"Be sure," he whispered, hot and desperate over my skin.

"I'm sure."

He led, we stumbled knowing down the narrow hall. Stilling in the doorway, I noticed his nest of rumpled sheets and sketchbooks. He wound around from behind, dusting my hair over. Sucking and tasting the skin at my throat, shoulder, angling for more, I felt his hand at my zipper. The heavy olive wool fell loose around me.

Turning slowly in his arms, I stepped back slowly towards his bed. Patient, he took me in. I weakened in a heady rush knowing he was seeing me so new. I swallowed rough at the hard outline through his thin pants.

At the bed's edge, he eased my dress down. I unclasped dark lace, as his lips found my neck, his tongue grazed as he pushed the rest to join my dress. He lowered, strong hands slid down bare skin to grasp my panties. We breathed courageous.

"God, you're fucking beautiful." Wet lips traveled my legs as he rose. It tickled, my laughter left me gasping within a nervous quiver. I fought to breathe. "It's okay. It is." He whispered against my suddenly shivering mouth. "I can't wait to feel you, Bella."

He stepped back, pushing his pants down his legs. _Fuck._ My throat tightened.

I crawled, falling back into down and pillows. He melted close, firm hands spreading my thighs, a leg pressed between mine. He traced a random pattern up and over the soft curve of my belly as I twisted in frustration from the feather light touch. Following the slope of my breast, nipples hardened and peaked. "Edward…" I arched, he lowered tasting, sucking gently. His hot mouth hovered and teased as his fingers slid lower. _Yes. God, yes. _

He stroked my pussy softly, taunting. I burned, spiraling ready.

"We need something."

He lifted, fumbling in the nightstand. I roamed his body, savoring with peppered kisses as he dealt with the condom. He spread me open, falling between and his hard cock against and ready. He steadied over. His stare overwhelming. "You…" I reached, dusting his cheek with the back of my trembling hand. My fingertips found his lips, his head fell over my chest. Arms braced and flexed, we finally found.

"Fuck, Bella."

He wrapped my leg at his waist and stroked forward. "Edward, yes…" Every measure of him slid deeper with each thrust. A quick, satisfying rhythm to begin and discover.

"You feel incredible."

Tongues tested and teased as we moved against each other, our bodies vulnerable, sensitive. We tangled fingers. Perfect warmth, faster than I'd ever known seeped low and through. He moved inside me, above me, and around me… pushing us furiously close to the edge. "I'm…" I moaned, shattering breathless beneath him.

"That's it…" I rode the sensation, tightening my legs again. He pushed harder, once then again, breathing my name as he came.

~oo~S~oo~

The manic rhythm and pound of the rain drowned my immediate morning after truth. There was finally something new for my history book. _For sure._ I reached still and silent to trace the dark permanent design down his arm. Swirl to straight a dream and design under my light touch. _Fuck. _I righted slowly, the pale, cool sheets barely covering and settling at my waist. My head dizzied, as I stretched to toe open the heavy wooden blinds. _Jerk. How dare you with these beautiful, clear beveled glass windows? I need these windows. _Smirking, a faint giggle to myself, I breathed deep, glancing down over my naked self. I opened to last night's memory with a shiver. Those silly selfish, righteous moments after a first when you feel so completely empowered flowed free. Suddenly, fingertips grazed my bare hip. I peeked over my shoulder, knowingly coy, winking. "You're still here," he whispered. Sleepy, sexy, smug, he tucked his pillow beneath his chest.

"I'm still here."

**a/n**

**Thank you very much for reading xo**

**ffpassion, obsmama, carenl... love you, thank you xxx**

**The addresses are fictional :) **

**Edward's back next week with his take on morning after bliss ;) **

**Have the best week, love you guys! xo**


	5. five

_**five. **_

"I used your toothbrush," she mumbled through bubbles and rinsing. She flashed bright in the bathroom mirror. We watched another, as I melted behind.

"Not the first time," I smirked, taking in my fucking fortune. My hands skimmed bare thighs, up and under a borrowed Packers t-shirt. She shivered, I held tighter, hands splayed across her smooth middle.

"I'm keeping this shirt. I think Emmett gave mine to his last girlfriend… Heidi?"

"Emily."

"You know everything about everything."

"I'm just hyper observant." I gently thumbed over her nipple, her head rolled back against my chest. "You can keep it… if you'll only wear it like this…" She giggled, playful. I kissed slow, small and light up her neck, she weakened. "You can't walk the streets of Chicago in it anyway."

"Edward…"

"Hmmm…"

She turned sudden in my arms, jumping to sit on the sink, pulling and trapping me between her legs. "Was it… I mean… last night…" Her inexperience rattled between us. Her wanting, worried eyes and smile bordered on pitiful. "Was I…"

"Shhhh…" I held her face firm in my hands, fingers dragging across swollen lips. "You were perfect." _Fucking perfect. _

She sighed soft. We kissed easy, laughing light against. "This is just…" She slid down, piling a wild hive of hair. A few quiet moments passed between.

"Let's go have some breakfast. I owe you a bagel."

"I'm not going anywhere but home in last night's clothes. I did enough of that in college."

"Enough? A lot? Early morning stumblings of shame? I can see you now…" She covered my eyes, shaking my head back and forth.

"No! Don't imagine that. Please. That's ugly and right now is… pretty." I gripped wrists, her touch tenderly tracing down my nose, over my mouth.

"Is it?"

"Yes. And… speaking of pretty… I need to get home, I'm painting this weekend."

"What? Where?" I pulled over a black v-neck.

"The north wall of the living room."

"You didn't tell me." She fell to the bed next to me as I tied my running shoes.

"Because I didn't want you to judge my shade choice."

"I would never judge your _shade_ choices."

"I'm judging yours."

"Bullshit. Which?"

"This green galore. It's hideous and not at all romantic for a bedroom. It's really bad, Edward."

"Are you being serious right now?"

"Yes, look…" She crawled, sprawling dramatic over the freshly made bed. "Don't I look ill?"

"Mentally. Yes. But still very beautiful…" She stilled, breathing deep, pinching her lips tight. I moved, my knee edging her bare center. "Beautiful."

"Yeah?" Whispering desperate, she reached.

"Yeah."

"Okay, I think I am hungry." She twisted. I'd pushed, we hadn't yet made the turn. _I want you to be excited, not afraid._

"I'll be right back. Just running up the street. Don't move."

"Can I at least look for my bra?" She shouted as I tossed my keys, cocky.

"No."

~oo~S~oo~

I ducked quickly under the bakery's dripping blue and gold awning, digging for my vibrating cell. "Did you find your bra?" I answered, joking quiet, holding the door for a busy family holding babies and such.

"Dude." _Fuck. Brett._

"Brett. I thought…"

"No shit. That's hilarious. So where's her bra and who's her? You lucky bastard." _Jesus._

"She's…" I moved towards the line, flustered.

"She's got bare tits at the moment, obviously. Are they great? Tell me they're great."

"Alright. Alright."

"Ah, come on man, you know I'm living vicariously through you and all that hot random sex in the city you're having." _Not random. At all._ "What's her name? Is this the Maria girl Bella was going on about?"

"No. Wait hold on, I need to order… Two blueberry bagels, a pumpkin muffin, a slice of banana nut loaf and..."

"Fuck man, that's a lot of carbs, must have been quite the night." _You have no idea. _

"It was. It was a very… surprising night."

"Yeah? Give me some deets man. It's slow and no go up here. Pregnant sex isn't all they promised."

"What the hell, man. Be good to your girl."

"Yeah. Yeah. You know I am. So, fucking spill."

"What are you sixteen?"

"Pretty much. Why surprising? She's into kinky stuff?"

"What? No. Okay, Brett, seriously, it's just…"

"Oh man, you don't even know her name, do you?"

"Yes, I know her name." _And so do you. Fucking stop. Please. _I took my change, bakery box and rushed towards home to hold her. Plans to talk it up through the Irish game distracted him. I was feeling the Bella buzz again as I pushed through the door.

"Okay, you greedy son of a bitch. Go enjoy the hot ass and perfect tits. Fuck, I miss morning sex."

The space fell silent. I moved through faster by the room. The stainless lamp over my drafting table was fixed at an odd angle. The corner of a note was tucked under a small template.

Block letters filled with swirls and more… _I decided if I'm going to be getting naked like that on a regular basis, I should not be eating bagels twice in one week. I'm also taking my life into my own hands and wearing the Packers t-shirt home sans bra on the Saturday streets of Chicago. Brave and shameless._

~oo~S~oo~

I blindly felt for my phone, balancing a nibbled red pencil between my teeth. Late night and last minute corrections for an early Monday meeting left me tense, but thankfully distracted. A Saturday Irish game, a Sunday Packers game, two days into wonder and worry, my patience was thin. Fucking finally…

I opened the new message and image from Miss Love 'em and Leave 'em. She stood game show style and stance in front of a freshly painted wall, cross eyed, tongue out silly. "_Presenting Ebony Smoke. I love it. It's gorgeous." You're gorgeous. _

"_Looks great." Way too dark. _

"_No judging?" _

"_It's a solid backdrop for those distressed shelves you bought." _

"_Awww, you remember those shelves? That was last year. Oh my god remember that estate sale?" _

"_Of course." _

"_So how are you? We still haven't talked. What did you do all weekend? Did you miss me? You didn't call." And you will be the death of me. _

"_Well, I made a pot of chili and waited for you to come watch football with me." _

"_You did not." _

"_Okay. I didn't." _

"_I'm sorry. Are you mad? You sound tired." _

"_You can't actually hear me. But, I'm fine."_

"_You are mad." _

"_You can make it up to me." _

"_Oh, I see. Well, we need some ground rules for this…." _

"_Is this a joke or are you serious?" _

"_Dead serious." _

"_Okay, go…" _

"_Rule one – absolutely no hanky panky in the office." _

"_We've taken a time machine back to 1955." _

"_Rule two – you cannot roll your sleeves up at work anymore." _

"_What in the hell?" _

"_It does things to me." _

"_I wear them rolled up everyday." _

"_Yes and it's a problem for me because it makes me want to say fuck rule number one." Good, rolled and done. Check. _

_"Rule number three – Edward and Bella are friends first and lovers after." Baby…_

"_Is that what we are?" _

"_What? Friends and lovers? Oh god. I'm embarrassed now. Stop it." _

"_I like it." _

"_Are you sure?" _

"_Is that all?" _

"_No. Last one. Rule number four – Absolutely no weeknight sleepovers. NONE!" _

"_Harsh."_

"_Edward, I have to concentrate. This Quileute project is big fucking deal for me. We've been pulling late nights anyway." _

"_True." _

"_We have to keep this locked down. No sexy smirky smirks from Mr. Smirkson in the hall or conference room. It fucking kills me." Sleeves rolled, smirking all day, everyday. Double check. _

"_Finished?" _

"_Yes. Oh wait! Sending something." _

"_Okay." _

_Another image, more words, my favorite smile, the slightest lip turn on the left, soft, sleepy eyes in front of the darkest wall. "Delete the first. Remember this. Good night, lover ;)" Crazy, perfect tease. _

~oo~S~oo~

"I love Fridays."

"Fridays are good." We stumbled through the ground floor entrance of her building, ten minutes after six. She trailed, tripping and skipping stairs behind, fingers tangled, satchels flying. We pushed the door closed and locked, together. I backed her against, body trapped.

"Fucking longest week ever."

"Your rules suck." Crushing curves, bags dropping, arms wrapping, fingers dug along the back of my neck.

"They do suck." I lowered, meeting her waiting mouth. "Fuck my rules." We breathed, laughed against, tongues tangling. I welcomed the heady heat, through and straight to my cock.

"I want to lose myself inside you, baby. I want you wrapped around me, fucking screaming my name." Hungry, eager she opened her mouth under mine, again. Her fingers, worked my buttons as she navigated back. I loosened the thick tie on her patterned dress, she spun forever to release the wrap, giggling.

Stripped down the hall and bare as we reached the bedroom, I marveled, slowing to appreciate. I threaded through her soft waves, swallowing to steady. Tilting to claim her mouth, I skimmed up silky skin, over her shoulders and to the soft swells of her breasts. She whimpered, sensitive nipples tightened and peaked. Touch and taste, sliding lower, my mouth to her throat, her neck… my hand light over her stomach and into the soft curls between her thighs. Her fingers tightened around my arms to balance, as I teased and stroked.

I pushed her gently to the bed, both overwhelmed. She pointed silent and necessary, I found and sheathed. Wide eyed wanting, she watched, breathing harder as I grasped my cock. She smoothed over her breasts with one hand, her mouth with the other. "You like what you see, baby?" I stroked up my hard length, back down. She nodded, her tongue peeking out along the tip of her finger. "Look at you, god I want your mouth on me… sliding that tongue up my cock, your lips wrapped around me…"

"Fuck…" Her legs parted, I rested between heels dug to pull closer. Hips lifted, she moaned ragged as I slid inside. Grasping for control, desperate to indulge, I worked her to beg, all the way out, then in shallow and slower. "Edward…"

"Say it again… I want to hear you, show me what you like."

I lowered, sucking her nipple into my mouth, pushing deeper as she arched, twisting beneath.

"I need more… please…" I opened her wider, pacing faster. She grasped, trembling handfuls of cool sheets for leverage. "God, Edward… oh my god, it's so…" Longer, deeper thrusts, lashes fluttered, she was breathless as she tipped. The sweet searing pleasure of release rushed as I pressed harder at the end.

I rolled, pulling her over and above. Cradling her blushed, beautiful face, I reached to kiss, easy, exhausted, grateful. We stared, something completely new passed between. Another level of discovery, more passionate, more intense than the last. "You okay?" I dragged my nose along hers, tucking into the sensitive spot below her ear. She squirmed, giggling sated. Propping up to stare, she tugged lazy through the hair on my chest.

"That was… you're…" I smirked at her inarticulate struggles.

"Score!" I squeezed her ass, laughing obnoxious, adrenaline flowing still.

"You're crazy." She swatted.

"I left you incoherent and speechless. That's a serious feat, baby. Believe me."

"Oh god, whatever." She rested, tucking closer, still over. "But, I like that."

"What's that?"

"_Baby_… I like it. No one has ever called me that before," she whispered, content. I feathered through her hair, smoothing down her naked back. The night settled outside, random horns and early weekend action.

"You're amazing."

"You're naughty."

"Am I?"

"Yes," she straightened, licking lips, arching brows. "I kinda like it."

"I could tell," I teased, she wrapped, tempting to tug low. "Watch it."

"Feed me."

~oo~S~oo~

The faint aging bell on the front door of _Renata's_ rang familiar. I guided Bella inside, stealing a glance again at the irresistible curve from behind covered in tight denim. _I'm fucking_ _drowning in you… _"How do you find all these cute little places?" She took in the cozy space, cheap dark wood paneling and faint candlelight.

"It's Edward! Renata, it's Edward, here." Bella startled at the robust, Polish accent and greeting rushing towards. Renata's husband offered usual warmth and welcome, kissing Bella on both cheeks, rolling her hand in his. "This is your baby sister? She's lovely." We choked, grinning guilty.

"No, no, this is Bella…"

"Just a friend. It's good to meet you." She beamed, still wearing our glow.

"Edward, you're handsome and just right." Renata checked me out and over, then squeezed Bella close. "You'll sit here. I'm making something special for the best friends." We relaxed into the same side of a far corner booth. The only two other diners glanced our way through the fuss.

"They're adorable. Oh my god." She shrugged in a nose wrinkling smile.

"They are good people. I've been coming here since my internship."

"When you were poor and didn't sleep with colleagues?" She winked, I gripped her thigh.

"And you were in ninth grade?"

"Yes. That's right. I'm the young, impressionable one in this here relationship," she mocked, tapping the table. _And I'll take the best care, don't worry, baby. _

Renata hurried over, leaving warm bowls. "You'll start with barszcz."

"Thank you, it smells wonderful."

"This is basically beet soup. You're good with that?"

"Of course. This is great." She sipped, I watched. "What?"

"We're going home next weekend."

"I know. It'll be okay. We'll be busy. Emmett's game, the baby shower… We have to keep this locked down though. Promise me. One word… Brett." Fucking hell. I cringed, remembering.

"Just friends."

"Oh, Jesus. Shut up and eat your soup. Stop staring at me. Seriously." She flashed a wide eyed warning. "Oh, do you think we'll have sauerkraut? I do love a big, juicy Rueben."

"Definitely sauerkraut. But better than you've had. Renata's is the best." She stilled, reaching to brush her palm over my hand, our fingers laced.

"Wine." They poured hearty and crisp.

"Swear to god, if he comes back playing the accordion, we're dancing." She started into my soup, after emptying hers.

"Come here," I mouthed, pulling her close.

"What," she whispered against my mouth, melting to kiss light. We breathed, knowing.

"We're going to make our own way with this."

"I know…"

"Just because it's different doesn't mean it has to be complicated."

_**a/n**_

_**Thank you for reading and being here xo**_

_**The absolute best... obsmama, ffpassion, carenl. Thank you, again and more xx**_

_**Some very lovely ladies nom'd Symmetry at The Lemonade Stand for fic of the week, please take a peek at this yummy blog and all the other super talented friends up of voting! www. tehlemonadestand. net **_

_**Hugs and thanks Twilover76, Nic, Edmazing, obsmama xo **_

_**They're traveling 'home' next week. Behaving could be a challenge ;) **_

_**So grateful for your words each week. Love you guys! xoxo** _


	6. six

_**six.**_

"Are you staring at my ass?"

"Maybe."

"You need to stop." She swayed dramatic. Tight, dark denim tucked into tall leather boots was her weapon.

"I can't." The ticket line was long, I closed the safe space between us. My hand grazed low, then lower to annoy and tease.

"Back off, buster. There are children near."

"We should've had a lunch rendezvous before we left town. Not sure I'll make it 'til half time."

"Why half time? What happens at half time?"

"You sound nervous." I whispered close.

"You're all talk."

"You like my talk."

Tickets in hand, we made our way to the concrete bleachers of our alma mater. Bella tore off and up the stairs as soon as she spotted her family. "Oh my god! Bethie you look so gorgeous and round! She gushed and rubbed and hugged. I steadied through a rush of guilt. Mr. Swan, Brett, and Beth welcomed and loved, forcing us certain and present. Falling into the gathering of other parents and teens, we sat two people apart, but always within a peek. "Em looks good, Dad." Charlie tossed her worn, familiar logoed baseball cap. She pulled it low and tight, winking at me.

"_And the crowd goes wild… ahhhhh…" Bella squealed, charging towards a young Emmett, football in tow. He laughed, waiting for contact. "Go wild, crowd! Geez, you guys are lame!" She raced past Brett and me. The practice field lit by a November night sky was our post game playground. We kicked back on the sideline to watch her show. _

"_Bella, come on. Truck's runnin'," Seth boomed, strutting towards, duffle and attitude slung. _

"_I'm playing with my little brother. Hold up." _

"_Seth, play some toss?" Emmett begged. _

"_Not now, little dude. I'm fucking beat." _

"_Watch your mouth, Clearwater. Emmett's only nine. Asshole." _

"_We had plans, babe." Seth nuzzled, tugging her sweatshirt, she squirmed, glancing over. "You were gonna show me that new, lacy bra you got… 'member." The fuck she is._

"_Is this prick serious?" Disgusted, I dug my boots deeper, bowing, ready to launch. "She's fucking sixteen." _

"_She's not going anywhere. Go home, Seth." Brett stood, flexing. _

"_I want to hang with my family tonight. Edward's only here for the weekend. I'll call you tomorrow." She reached tip toed to peck, he turned towards us, eyes narrowed. _

"_Fuck this shit. It's always about your damn family, Bella." He spat, stalking off. "Find another ride to school Monday." _

"_I will. No fucking problem," Bella huffed, sighed and shook. _

"_He's a loser, B. Let it go." _

"_I'm fine, Brett." He pulled her into a tight, rough hug. Emmett ran close to join, wrapping small arms around both. _

"_You have the worst taste in guys," Brett mumbled into her hair, kissing kind. "I've gotta go pick up Beth from the restaurant. Edward can you run these two home?" _

"_Of course." _

"_Love you, B," Bella whispered as Brett walked towards the dark high school parking lot. _

"_Love you more, B. Get that monkey to bed soon too," he shouted, waving behind. They fell next to me, Emmett between. _

"_You okay?" _

"_Ugh. I'm fine. He's right, though. I only date losers. It's embarrassing."_

"_Nah, it's easy for him to judge, he's had a great girl since the seventh grade. You'll grow out of it. Find someone with more brain than muscle." She stared, smiling. _

"_Have you ever chosen bigger boobs than brains, Edward Cullen?" _

"_Daily." _

"_Gross. That's not true." We laughed, falling back. _

"_Just promise me you won't go showing your bra to every guy that asks… Okay?"_

"_Oh god." She hid behind the football. "Okay, okay… but… can you take me to school on Monday before you leave for Chicago?"_

"_You know I will." _

"_Yeah…" _

"_Guys, which star do you think is Mom's heaven house?" Emmett asked, we stilled, soaking the weight of the moment and wonder. _

"_I think it's that one." I pointed, they shifted to follow in the faraway sky. _

"_No. Nope, that one doesn't have the sun room she wanted," Bella played along. _

"_She wanted a sun room?" _

"_Yeah. Dad told me. With a Mexican tile floor, wall to wall windows, for an art studio like space. Painted banana yellow." _

"_Banana's are white," Emmett giggled. _

"_Oh my god, complex thinking little man. I like it." Bella tickled over him. _

"_That space sounds like Renee." I drifted, visualizing. _

"_I bet he'd do anything to build that for her now." Her voice cracked in the quiet. I reached over Emmett's head, hooking my finger in hers. _

"You've got to fucking maintain possession! Jesus Christ!" She shouted oblivious and in motion.

"Bella, we're not at a Packers game," Beth reminded, calming the flail.

"I know. I know. I'm sorry. But come on, people!"

"So, tell me about this new girl." Brett leaned, brow cocked.

"What?" I shook.

"Who?" Bella asked, stumbling, pushing past Charlie, Beth to get close. She wiggled between.

"I'm trying to get this greedy asshole to spill deets on the naked woman at his place last week." Bella smirked. Slapping over my leg, she clapped crazy.

"Oh. She's amazing, Brett. What did he share so far? Just that she likes to get naked, or?"

"Nothing. I told him nothing," I warned. "Drinks?" I offered, nodding, suggesting.

"Hot chocolate all around. We'll be right back." She jumped. Charlie shoved a large bill into her hand and we headed down. I pulled her just behind the white painted cement block corner.

"Having fun?" I whispered, dragging my nose along hers.

"Yes," she giggled, brushing over my mouth. "I do like getting naked with you. But my brother doesn't need to know that. Deal?"

"You're nuts." I kissed her forehead, tugging to turn… _into Beth_, wide eyed, frozen.

~oo~S~oo~

"Stop thinking about it." She shifted, licking and popping her lips.

"I'm not. I'm good."

"She's not going to say anything." _Maybe I want her to. Maybe I want to. Shout it to the fucking world. Forever. _

"Stop torturing me." She scratched over my denim. Seatbelt released, she leaned, breasts skimming my shoulder, lips pressed soft along my neck.

"_I'm _torturing _you_?" Sweet, testing hands worked higher, sliding over the growing bulge in my jeans. "This… as I'm driving to drop you off at your dad's house and then home to my mother's. It's going to be the longest fucking weekend ever."

"Football makes me horny," she whispered, I shivered. Squeezing my dick, Bella nipped to tease my chilled ear lobe. "Come on, Edward." She pursed pretty lips, pouting, irresistible. "Don't you want to have your wicked way with me?" Patience tested, my foot slid to brake and stop. I slipped the car into park, killed the engine and focused on her stroking and taunting mouth.

"I'm not having sex with you in my car."

"Prude," she huffed, tugging my bottom lip between her teeth. "Who said anything about sex, anyway? It's the Lake. We're just going to make out." A coy smile, a surreptitious stare and she straddled. Her thighs worked over my hips, worn denim burning between. Our tongues danced easy but eager, my fingers tangled into her loose, wind blown waves. I smoothed thumbs over the soft curves of her cheeks and jaw.

Fast fingers worked my jacket open, sliding under my shirt, pressing into my skin and then lower. I eased back, our breathing ragged, chests heaving. I pressed my forehead to hers.

"Slow down, baby."

"I feel like… like I can't get enough of you, Edward. When we're together, I want more. I want to feel your eyes on me, your skin against mine, your lips against mine…" I reveled in the new balance of want, need. Her bold sexual energy was hypnotic.

I trailed a finger over the curve of her mouth. Her tongue teased my skin as she rolled her hips against mine again.

"I'm serious… we're not having sex in my car."

She laughed softly, "Just relax. Don't mind horny, deprived, little old me."

I groaned grateful, our mouths opened, tongues tangled as her thighs tightened. She rocked and slid against my dick. Slipping my hands under the hem of her black sweater, over her bare back, I pushed up lace cotton. She tipped back, her fingers digging deeper through my hair as I thumbed over her nipples. She gasped as they peaked, moving faster. I forced my hips harder and watched her move above me. _Stunning._

"Fuck, Edward. You're going to make me come."

I slid my tongue over her swell as I gently tugged the lace to reveal. I tasted one nipple, rolling the other as she rode me more deliberate, more desperate.

"Are you going to come, baby?" I rocked higher ready to see her fall apart.

"Yes…" She moaned, breathless, tipping. Languidly swiveling, slowing as I smoothed down her spine. She loosened her grip through my hair, my hands splayed strong on her ass helping to rub against me. "Edward…"

"Hmmm…" I tucked into her warmth.

"What was that…" Soft lips dusted my cheek. "What was that you mentioned the other night…" Teeth gently nipped my chin. "Something about my lips… my tongue…" She licked and tickled down my throat. "And your cock…" _Fuck. Yes._

~oo~S~oo~

I left the heavy gift box on the granite countertop next to the platter of blueberry loaf. I tasted the crumble topping and grabbed an empty wine glass. "Mom…"

"Out here." I followed the pool lighting glow through the back French doors. "I'm here. You found me," she mumbled, straightening the plaid designer blanket over her.

"What are you doing?" I kissed her cheek and settled on the edge of the wide deck lounge near her feet, tucking the wool tighter under.

"It's a beautiful night."

"It's freezing."

"But I can feel it…" We held the moment staring. I recognized her current phase of the perpetual ache and fight.

"Okay. That's okay." I nodded, validating her own normal. "I brought you a new pot. A new Dutch oven for your winter soups."

"You did? I love it. Thank you, sweetheart." She sat forward, seeking a hug.

"Bella chose the color. It's an eggplant shade, sort of. She's kind of neurotic with colors."

"Sounds lovely. How is she? I miss that silly girl."

"She's great, actually. Yeah…" I focused on the dim moonlight skimming the pool water.

"Yeah, what?" She poked with an anxious foot. "What's that strange, smug look?"

"So you're coming to this baby shower tomorrow with me, right?"

"I think so. Hope so. Let's see what the morning feels like…"

"Mom…" I rested weary, chin in palm to study her. "Would you ever leave?"

"Leave what?"

"This house. Madison."

"And go where? Chicago? No way. You don't need your mother underfoot in your fast, wonderful life."

"It's not that fast."

"But it's wonderful, isn't it? Tell me it's wonderful."

"It is."

"Does Bella make it wonderful?"

"What?" I choked.

"She does. I can see." She smiled, real, true, rare. Her periphery darkness always made matters of the heart deeper, wiser. "Oh, Edward…"

"I got the University of Florida project, Mom" I spilled. A liberating release of truth that made life and love wide open. She reached, I tumbled her hand in mine. "They accepted our bid officially this week. It's insane. I'm..."

"Congratulations. That's just amazing."

"I'm shocked. Still absorbing it. It's a big deal."

"I know it is," she whispered, nodding.

"Come with me. I'll build you something. We'll find you a small, swanky condo in the sun." She shook, grinning proud.

"What about the _wonderful_?"

"I don't know…" I trailed, still feeling Bella's touch, her mouth, her smile. "I just don't know yet… "

**a/n**

**Thank you for being here. We have truly the best reader friends ever and thank you all for your votes over at the lemonade stand! xx**

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**Tell us how your heart feels. See you on Monday! **

**Keep the faith fluffy ;) Love you guys xx**


	7. seven

_**seven. **_

"Esme, you look so pretty!" Bella pulled her tight, winking over my mother's shoulder. "What is this jumper? It's wool and delicious and I might have to borrow this. Everyone's doing these in the city. With boots, tights. I love this one. You're always so stylish, Mama C." She led her forward, sunshine and best intent. I marveled behind, squeezing hidden hands. Brett and Beth, the expecting guests of honor, stopped us in the hall with hugs.

"Let's find you a smock, Esme." Beth smiled sweet. "Bella woke up with big, silly ideas, per usual."

"Yeah, our resident art weirdo thought it would be fun to tie dye some baby duds. Because we can't just have cake and construct cribs and strollers." Brett tugged Bella's hair to tease. She promptly pummeled. A swell of celebration and crazy grew as we loaded Charlie's dark stained backyard deck with gifts and food. Maples and Pines, dense and autumn bright, lined the party.

"Edward come, come. I need help carrying…" Silent, knowing smirks, we tucked into the hazy side garage. Holding close, breathing each other in, I bit the tip of her nose, as she whimpered. "I couldn't sleep."

"No?" My lips dusted her forehead, hands roamed.

"I missed you."

"You should've called." I gripped gentle under her jaw to appreciate. Quiet, natural beauty, searching eyes, there was a shift and change.

"Kiss me serious…"

"Yeah?" I whispered against her parted mouth. "You okay?"

"Mmmm… Now I am." Tender, deeper, lips moved and found.

~oo~S~oo~

"I'm not kidding!" Bella squealed, holding her amber glass bottle high. "I had him model every last one of these flowered diaper bags."

"It's true. Then we had to buy two."

"We couldn't decide. You looked so cute carrying all of them. Edward is like that totally awesome, amazing, surreal boyfriend that stops and buys tampons if you need him too. Like no questions, no big deal." She winked, giggling. She'd slipped, tipsy. Beth stood tensed, straightening.

"It's time to get in touch with your feminine side anyway, Brett. A baby girl…"

"What!" Bella pointed, the group gasped. _Shit._

"Edward, always with the big mouth."

"It's a girl? And they told _you_!" Bella leaped, knocking me sideways. "And you didn't tell me? I hate all of you right now!" She pouted, we laughed.

"There's just so few surprises, anymore, B. And you're always so damn nosy." Brett rushed towards her, she screamed wild. Over his shoulder, kicking down the stairs, they disappeared. Beth immediately cozied next to me.

"What?" I mouthed over the top my bottle, she shoved shoulders. "Don't start, please… don't start."

"What are you doing? Seriously."

"We're good. It's good." I nodded. A new, honest moment woven in the crowded, perfect afternoon. She watched me close.

"How long? How long has this been going on?"

"Not long."

"Bella's… she's so young, Edward. Everything is brand new for her right now."

"Not really, Beth…" I tightened, frustrated. "She's a determined, wise, accomplished young woman. I learn something new from her everyday."

"Oh god." She scoffed.

"It's happening. This is happening. And honestly, I'm not really in the mood to make a case for it. I love you but…"

"I hope you know what you're doing. If you hurt her…"

"I would never hurt her. Never. Why the hell would you say that?"

"She's looked up to you since she was a child. You're her boss now, Edward. This is more emotionally complicated than you are taking the time to understand…"

~oo~S~oo~

She washed, I rinsed, skin sliding under the suds. The late, low October sun lit her faint freckles through the kitchen window. _You're perfect._ "Let's redesign Dad's deck," she mumbled. Our view matched, gazing outside together.

"We can do that."

"It's so outdated. I don't like it. Those spindles are... Maybe this spring we can come up…" _But, I won't be here in this Spring, baby..._

"The loot is loaded. Beth's tired and moody." Brett gripped my shoulders, leaned to kiss Bella's cheek.

"Awww… why? Is she okay?" Bella wondered, worried. "Today was the best, though." Beth's warning menaced my heart.

"She's eight months pregnant, B. It just is what it is," Brett shrugged. "You'll know one day." She reactively peeked, I smiled. "So, Ben's gig is at ten tonight. I'll pick you up. Edward you meeting us there?"

"She can just ride with me. I'll stick around here, help clean up."

"Jesus. You two are like glue… We'll see you guys downtown at ten."

"Okay, kids…" Charlie interrupted. "I'm going to take Esme to five o'clock mass and maybe for one of those fancy coffees after."

"What?" Bella bounced towards them. "That's perfect."

"You think the Michigan game will be on at _Froth_?" Charlie joked.

"Daddy, they don't have televisions at _Froth_. You're supposed to relax, be present and concentrate on your conversation." She hugged both, cupping her hand to whisper. "But do you think Bell will get as many yards as last week? Their defense kicked ass."

"I doubt it, 253 is a big number, but we can always hope." Charlie mumbled, helping Mom into her coat. "What do you say, Esme?" She smirked, warm, indulging an old friend's effort.

"Bella, I thought you were a Badger girl through and through?"

"Oh you know I am, Mama C." Another squeeze, I warmed watching my two favorite women, always good and gracious with each other. "Please, please come see us in Chicago. Edward knows the best restaurants and I want to show you my apartment. I finally painted."

"I will, I will soon, precious girl."

"What time will Emmett be home?" Bella shouted after them, fingers dancing slow, secret down my back.

We bolted. Up the stairs and into her childhood bedroom, an audible close and lock, we sighed grateful. She pulled silky black and white polka dots up and over her head throwing it onto her suitcase. "An empty house… what ever will we do?" She climbed, flirting silly onto the quaint double bed.

"Fucking finally."

"Get naked with me…" She pursed perfect lips. I toed off my boots, stepping closer, dropping my green sweater, making a messy trail. Leaning back, her elbows propped, breasts barely covered beneath black lace. _Fuck. _ Using my knee to open her legs, I hovered. Skimming a slow finger over her soft swell, she tipped back, nipples tightening. _That's right._ Her thighs pressed against mine, bare toes trailed the back of my leg. I lowered, she lifted to meet. Lips dusted, as I cupped her breast, thumb brushing relentless over taut peaks.

"God, I fucking want you, baby… be mine."

Gentle lips skimmed my jaw, she tasted, tongue sliding down my neck. "You're the sexiest talking Valentine card ever…" We bursted, laughing loud, easy.

"Brat." I offered an arched brow warning. Skating lower over smooth skin, I unbuttoned her dark denim, still nipping and peppering down.

"I'm yours," she whispered, arching. I thrust reactively against, sucking her nipple into my mouth. "Keep me forever…" _Baby, I want to. _She tugged through my hair, whimpering as I made a wet, hot path toward her hips. I freed her legs, denim, lace and cotton fell to the floor.

"You're so beautiful, Bella." A blush and smile grew. A wind, chill settled through the evening light. I righted, ridding my own jeans, grabbing a condom as she scooted back on the simple white chenille swirled bedspread. I kneeled between her parted thighs, watching her heated, desperate want as I traced lazy patterns from her ankles to her calves… teasing the soft skin behind her knees to her open thighs.

"Edward…" Our mouths met, brushing slow. She moaned, tongues testing as my cock pressed at her heat.

I licked down her throat, my fingers grazing to follow a path low. Over her breasts, down the gentle curve of her stomach… then I tasted, slow, stroking, deepening as she swiveled hips against me. "Yes… more." Her thighs tightened at my shoulders, she pulled through my hair as I slipped fingers inside. Wrapping want around me, I teased her clit as she moaned through her high.

Sliding back up and over, I covered her in feather light kisses, gently biting until I reached her open mouth. "You like that don't you…" She nodded, breathless. "Feel what you do to me…" I forced against, my cock trapped between.

"Please…"

Nails dug, I pressed, shallow, teasing. _Sweetest fucking pussy… _Mellow, I moved, reveling as time slowed. Thumbing over her warm cheeks, tracing her lips, I rocked deeper. A rhythm growing intense as the best burn spread. _I'm fucking falling, baby… _"Bella…" She wrapped her legs around my waist to beg, deeper, faster. "I want you to come again…"

"Mmmm…. God…" My tongue sweeping into her mouth, we breathed together, skin slick and tingling.

"Fuck…"

~oo~S~oo~

Furiously sketching, the pillow was our easel. She stretched over, her naked front to my bare back. Digging her chin in my shoulder to reach, she ground the charcoal frustrated in the fading natural light. "What about making this wall… like if I made it transparent though. Glass? The entire wall…"

"I thought this was stacked wood?" I pointed, grabbing the pencil.

"It was. It is. Ahhhhh. But it would flow better. Too modern?" She hummed against my ear, nibbling.

"Be careful of the material blend. I'm just thinking about the slate you chose for here and here. And… those ridiculous ornamental doors _they_ chose."

She pinched my ass. "Okay. Enough work. But wait, speaking of doors you hate. Or I hate or… you know that horrible pocket door on my bathroom? I was thinking… maybe… okay don't cringe or judge… but what if I found an over sized distressed door and hung it on the exterior of that opening. Like sliding from the top on huge metal hinges… a old salvaged door."

"I like it."

"We could paint it like a wild accent color."

"I'll pick the color." Teeth sunk and gnashed down my arm.

"Whatever… you only wish you had my sharp eye," she sassed. Fingertips, then soft lips followed the path of my tattoo. She sighed through a giggle.

"What's so funny?" We laced fingers over head, nestling deeper.

"I was remembering that the same day you and Brett got all this cool dude ink, I got my sad pre pubescent braces."

"Oh, yeah…"

"Ugh. Please erase the visual right now. Such a dork."

"You were not. That day actually sucked though."

"You're mom was so pissed. Poor Esme… You goons should have just tattooed a small heart with my name in it or something."

"True." We laughed light, she brushed her cheek against mine. "My dad was more pissed, actually."

"Your dad's an asshole."

"Yes."

"Have you heard anything lately?"

"I think Rachel's pregnant." I scoffed, she gasped.

"What? You didn't tell me that! Oh my god. You have to tell me stuff like that, Edward."

"Don't yell. I'm trapped under you."

"I'm your person. And we should talk about horrible, insane life issues like that. He's like one hundred and she's what? Twenty nine? Talk about age differences..."

"What about them? It doesn't matter. He's made his choices and he's getting on with his life."

"I know, but I know you hurt for your mom. And she's still hurting."

"She smiled a lot today."

"She really did. She looked adorable."

"You make her smile."

"You make _me_ smile… I'm selfish and needy for your gorgeous smiles." She slipped off my back, tucking deep. I kissed her nose, closed lashes, her forehead. "I think the window's open."

"I think it is too."

"Good. I hope the entire 'hood heard me scream." We laughed, I tickled down her spine. "I'm a screamer, you know." _I do know and I fucking love making you scream._

"How many boyfriends have you had up here? Hmmm…"

"Wouldn't you like to know." Coy, smug, she licked swollen lips, then rolled dark, tired eyes. "God, please. None. You know that."

"Liar."

"I swear. How the hell was I supposed to sneak guys up here in this house full of over protective crazies?"

"True. Brett was a loose fucking canon." She righted, I rubbed over my face, letting some truth settle.

"You're the very first. Lucky you." Her hand stroked gentle, my cock reacted.

"I better be the last."

"Oh really?" She teased, leaping from the bed, bare and fantastic. _Goddamn_, _I'm a lucky son of a bitch. _Gripping the white painted window edge, she pressed lips to the screen. White shears billowed around her sweet ass. "Edward Cullen is naked in my bedroom! Eat your fucking hearts out, Madison!" She slammed it closed.

"Get the fuck over here." She climbed quick, straddling. I sat to meet, my palm holding her face close. "You're crazy," I whispered against her mouth, tangling through her knotted hair.

"I know." She lifted, we stared. Lashes fluttered closed as she eased down onto my cock.

"Let me get something."

"It's okay… we're okay…" She nodded, I relaxed back. Ultimate intimacy, we embraced the feeling full and present.

"Baby… look at you…" I gripped gently as she moved, lost and awed. Dropping, lifting, she worked her own slow, passionate tempo.

~oo~S~oo~

Stumbling blissed and sated, we laughed taking in the photo collage through the upstairs hall. Important moments captured, goofy adolescent grins, small and tall, I was ever present in almost all. I snuggled behind, her bare feet digging over mine as we walked awkward and ridiculous towards the stairs. She narrated the timeline, I buried into her wild, sexed hair. My cock stirred again as hands drifted up, over her bare breasts beneath her thin silky shirt. "Wait, wait..." she giggled, naughty. "Let's get the left over cake first." We took the dark stairs slow, nipping and nuzzling. She spun suddenly, staring. "Edward... I..." She searched, seemingly overwhelmed. _I know, baby... I feel it too. _Surrounded by memories and truth, the setting, that house, our entire lives and we finally found and shared something new, ours. "I..." She breathed, swallowing deep, shivering fingers circled my sides.

I thumbed over her mouth, mirroring the content, peaceful smile. "I do too..."

"Yeah?" She mouthed, biting my thumb, sighing relieved. I kissed her wrinkled nose, her lips. Then a slam, a shout... Bella gasped, gripped.

"What the fuck, Edward? My fucking sister..." _Brett._

**_a/n _**

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**_And so it goes... love and life. Bella tells the next ;) _**

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	8. eight

_**eight. **_

_**from Bella.**_

"Don't leave," I whispered, he leaned. "Don't go." I kissed, nibbling over our linked, cold knuckles. He pulled me in, wrapping close, his hand cradled the back of my head. We fell against his car door, I stared at the purple surprise darkening between his lip and jaw. "That's going to be nasty."

"It'll give me character, no?"

"No."

"No?" He smirked, cringing through a sure, fresh sting. "Okay." Edward tucked, lips hovering over my ancient scar, to my temple, dragging soft to my forehead.

"We're about a day away from being the feature attraction on one of those wretched talk shows, you know…" I felt his chuckle and chilled tremble.

"I'm sorry."

"Hush, you." I drew back, tightening his dark wool tighter across his chest.

"Nah. I think Brett's been wanting to do that since Mrs. Cope made me playground patrol two weeks in a row and Brett got nothing."

"He's pathetic."

"He loves you. And hey… promise me you won't jump in the middle of swinging punches again. That was _not_ smart." Hands gripping my shoulders, he chided, shaking side to side, playful.

"Please. I can take him." I mocked some moves. He grabbed, taming my flying fists.

"That's enough, Sugar Ray. Go inside and make nice." He squeezed, then slid quick into the driver's seat. "Call me if you need back up."

"I'll miss you," I pouted.

"I'm not far." He winked. "Pick you up in the morning."

"Kay."

~oo~S~oo~

Brett's knees bounced, head low. He fumed at the bottom of the stairs, I dug in, ready.

"You're an asshole."

"Am I?"

"Yeah. You are. I have a fucking Master's degree. I make more fucking money than you and Dad combined and I get to fall in love with whoever the hell I want to, Brett."

"Well good for you, Bella. You haven't learned shit as far as life lessons go if that's how you measure your worth."

"Yes. It is good for me. I'm really happy. _We're_ really happy." I softened, hoping. He stood, straightening and towering.

"You may be super smart here, baby sis, but you're an idiot here." He poked, head to heart. "Do you have any idea how many women he's breezed through. A lot. A lot of fucking around, Bella. He can't sit still. He left Jennifer reeling. Remember that mess?"

"Oh please."

"You'll be next. Begging and bawling at his fucking doorstep."

"Fuck you. That's an awful thing to say." I fought the burn, arms crossed. "He's your best friend, Brett."

"Exactly."

"Exactly." I pushed, he tensed. "You're jealous. You're pouting and pissed because you won't be the center of his attention."

"Whatever."

"He's your out. Edward's the escape from _your_ reality. That's it. You've lived through him. He got to do all the things you wished you could have. You chose comfort and safety. He went for it."

"No, Bella. I live and actually love my reality. The two of you horny fools are living a fantasy. He's your fucking boss. He brings you down there. Hours from us so he can fuck around without us knowing. This is a game. He'll grow out of this. And you'll be lost in Chicago with nothing. No one." I tugged anxious through my hair, kicking the toe edge of his boots.

"Shut up. Can you for fucking once shut up, Brett! You don't own me! And I'm so fucking sorry Edward and I are…" Charlie suddenly cleared his throat, he squared, sighing at the peak of the second floor.

"Your mother would be heartbroken hearing this bullshit. Go home, Brett."

"No problem. I'm done." Narrowed eyes, red burning his cheeks, he rushed by.

"Brett…" I hurried, hurt and raw. "Brett…"

"_What are you doing here?" I wiped cold rain across my face, shifting the wet basketball under my arm. _

"_Dad said you might be up here. Get in." _

"_I can walk. I want to walk home." _

"_Bella, get in the goddamn truck," Brett warned, eyes wide, impatient. _

"_I'm soaked." _

"_You stink." _

"_Thanks." _

"_You okay? Scoot that way. Don't get this wet." He shoved my shoulder. _

"_What is that?" _

"_A dress." _

"_Oh." I stared at the spring storm pounding our way home. _

"_Oh? Not oh. It's for you. Oh!" _

"_For what?" _

"_Prom." I gestured my response. "It's your prom dress." _

"_You did not buy me a prom dress." _

"_Yes. I. Did." He smiled smug. "Well, I mean Bethie was with me. But yes. It's yours." _

"_Brett, you're weird and stupid. I mean thank you. But Prom is like in three hours or something and I don't have a date because Seth still sucks and he apparently likes fucking around with sophomore cheerleaders instead of me. And I'm done looking like a fool and I'm going to watch the Brewers game with dad in my fucking pajamas." _

"_Your language is why you don't have a fucking date but I'm glad you wised up to that loser." He sighed, a gentle hand swept over mine. "You're better than that shit." _

"_Yeah." I peeked, my fingers tugging the top of the bag. "It's green." _

"_You look nice in green. Mom used to wear green… A lot of green." I let lids fall, focusing, desperate to see. _

"_Thank you… Brett. Really, thank you." Punching his shoulder, I scooted closer, resting the bag in my lap. "Thanks for always showing up…" _

~oo~S~oo~

"Knock, knock…" I eased Dad's bedroom door open.

"Yep…" He laid semi propped over a dark duvet, metal frames at the tip of his nose, cell tight in hand.

"Are you texting? Oh my god!" He barely glanced, I dove in next to him trying to strip the phone from his grip. He held high, low, we laughed, struggled. "You better not be _sexting_, Dad."

"What's that?" His sarcasm forever subtle and smooth. _My hero…_

"Who are you conversing with at this hour, anyway? Give it to me. Let me see."

"None of your business. You've got enough to think about." I fell back, sinking in the safe and familiar.

"Dad, that was horrible, I'm so sorry. Are you…"

"Dude, why are you guys still awake?" Emmett climbed clumsy onto the bed. He settled into a dip at the end, pan of party leftovers in hand.

"How was your date?" I toed his fork, fingers.

"Get your feet out of my meatballs, Bella. That's fucking disgusting."

"My feet aren't disgusting. Your appetite is disgusting."

"Whatever. It was fine. Her mom hates me though."

"How could any mom hate you? You're adorable. And who's Dad texting?" Charlie hit me hard with a pillow.

"Who? Susan?"

"Who's Susan?"

"She's a friend of Esme's. Can we get back to your life now?" Dad wrapped me close, kissing soft over my head.

"What'd you do now, B?" Still shoveling meatballs and sauce, Emmett wondered sincere.

"You know I love Edward like my own," Charlie mumbled low.

"Edward? You and Edward?" Emmett shrugged. "I dig it. You both draw and shit. Makes sense."

"You know how to make sense?" I teased, dragging my toe through the last of the meat marinade.

"B, you're so fucking nasty." He shouted in dramatic disgust as I toed the sauce over his forehead. "Bitch." Charlie and I roared.

"What's all this?" Ben smiled, falling onto the last measure of bed next to me. "You missed my gig, B." He hugged tight, I breathed in bar, smoke and love.

"I'm sorry. I failed all over the place tonight. There was a rumble in the foyer and it was awful and I'm awful and I'm in love and that might be awful. And Brett hates me."

"No, she was too busy bangin' Edward," Emmett popped the last meatball in his big, loud mouth.

"That's not what it is."

"That's not breaking news," Ben grinned. "She's had it bad for him for years."

"Guys stop." I sat, crawling to my knees.

"Bella, you didn't tell him. Or us. That's the root of his reaction." Charlie nodded, smiling soft. "It caught him off guard. And me too, frankly."

"Because, it's still new. It's ours. I don't know…"

"But you can trust us to understand. You don't need to hide anything. Ever. You know that." I snuggled closer again.

"I know. I think _we're_ still trying to understand."

~oo~S~oo~

The dizzy stir of winding roads and gold autumn sun forced my eyes closed. A rhythm shift and change threatened in the season shadows. His lips dusted, lingered against the inside of my wrist. "So quiet?" Edward whispered, I sighed.

"Just tired."

"No you're not." My hand fell. I watched the smirk and shake. Gritting annoyed, our moods dimmed.

"Don't be defensive."

"Bella, I'm not being defensive. I have nothing to defend."

"Okay."

"Okay."

"Fine."

"Fine. Look…" He pointed, I gasped.

"Oh my god." I let the seatbelt snap, craning, leaning. "What are we doing up here… I didn't even notice. I thought we were half way to Chicago! Are you kidnapping me?"

"Maybe." Slow, we stalked out of the Audi, stilling side by side, taking in the Wolfgang Estate, an architectural marvel and masterpiece. "It'd be a great place to disappear. That's for fucking sure."

"Is this place for sale? Seriously?"

"It is. Remember how we used to trespass when it was under construction?"

"But now we can actually go inside and explore and die of lust and jealousy?"

"Yep."

"Let's buy it." I leaped, he caught, we melted.

"I would… I would buy it for you. If I could…"

"You would? I know you would. This is the best surprise detour, side trip in all the world. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you." I tugged his bottom lip between my teeth. _Goddammit, I just want to eat you up and make love to you all day and night and…it's just so much it scares me…_

He pulled me tight behind. I breathed in his dark, chilled wool, nuzzling, stumbling. We engaged two eager selling agents, falling easy into discoveries that interested one then the other. We split, drifting to find and awe on our own. I zoned, tuning out the vague, rote points. Visualizing life and love happening in such a rambling, vacant space. I warmed, remembering our recent romps tucked in the small city walls and digs instead.

The rear of the property was endless. An expanse of yellowing October grass leading to Lake Wingra's shoreline. I tapped anxious along the white shine of the farmhouse sink. His boots shuffled along the imported tile, his reflection brightened in the French window as strong arms wrapped from behind. I reached, gently feathering through his hair as lips teased my neck. "I lost you."

"Mmmm… well, don't do that again." I shivered as he sighed deep, tickling heat along my skin.

"So, I noticed an abundance of pocket doors…" He taunted, smart, sarcastic.

"Huh. Go figure. Doesn't quite meet the aesthetic if you ask me."

"I'm asking." _Ask me. Ask me anything._

"Yeah? Well, I find it a lazy design element."

"You're a tough customer, Bella Swan. You do realize this is the infamous Wolfgang Estate…"

"Blah." His laughter swelled, I spun in his arms. "I do like the free flow feel of the casual den. And the Japanese style sliding door in the formal living. Those hinges were fucking incredible. You know how sensitive and picky I am about my hinges. That's what I wanted for my bathroom remember?" He nodded, eyes narrowing, smiling overwhelmed. "And the simple pewter hardware and clean line maple in this kitchen is really… I don't know… I really like it."

"How very modern of you, baby." He tucked, soft pecks as I shook my hair back.

"I'm under the influence lately, I guess." I pinched, twisting a fistful of his black sweater. "Under the influence of a modern, masterful mind…" _My mentor, my lover, my fucking boss… _I turned, doubt lurked, high, low, back again.

"Talk to me, Bella." Quiet moments passed, heavy and aching. "I thought this would be a mindless, fun diversion." I nodded, fighting the sting. "Shhh… This weekend was a lot. I know it was."

I angled, desperate. Staring silent at something so much bigger than my heart could process. "Kiss me."

He forced me to face, pressing harder. We slid and tilted, as he tangled through my hair. His mouth dipped to mine, hungry, knowing. We moved furiously, breaking to breathe, I dug beneath layers to trace over warm skin. His strong palms gripped, guiding along my cheek, jaw.

"It is, Edward. It's so much. Maybe it's too much."

"What do you need, baby. Tell me what you need me to do." He tucked stray waves behind my ears, studying calm.

"I need to trust this. And…"

"And what? Tell me."

"And I need it to be the most honest thing in my life. In our lives. I just…" I gestured wild, falling onto the leather breakfast banquet. He teetered, knees bent near.

"I'm leaving."

"What?"

"I have to leave. To Florida. We got the University expansion and…" He laced our fingers, to balance. "I'll be back and forth. Could be a year, maybe more." _The plans, the fucking plans all over your drafting table at home. I know this already, I know, I know, I knew. Fuck. Oh my god, I'm so stupid. _

"No. Wow. That's just so… that's great. Congratulations, bossman. That's huge. I mean, I heard rumblings about that bid when I got there… to Garrett Paul, you know… Yeah. So okay. No, that's really…" I righted, smoothing down my black wool shift. Forcing a hasty smile, sucking in a salty stray tear.

"Bella…" His thumb skimmed down my temple. "We bid this before you even interned. I never thought we had a chance."

"Stop. It's amazing. It's _the_ design coup of the decade."

"I wouldn't go that far."

"It is. It's an insanely huge opportunity. You'll be project manager... I'm assuming?" _Please say no. Please say no. Please... I'll never see you. Feel you..._

"Looks that way... Mr. Paul wants me to lead..." _Of course he does. And you will and the project, the design, the result will be perfect. Just like you._ I bounced, squeezing him tight to hide, my heart shattering through a free fall.

"I have to be there Tuesday. Come with me. It's just for four days, just some preliminary studies. I want you there." _Why? Waiting naked in the hotel after dark? Fuck this mess. My family. You. This. _

"No. No, I can't. I mean I wish I could. But I have that meeting with Sam Uley on Thursday and… just some…stuff. You know… I've got…" _I've got to breathe. _

**_a/n _**

**_Sigh. Hi and thank you so much for reading xx _**

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	9. nine

_**nine.**_

_**from Edward.**_

"Hi." One ring, I heard her smile.

"Hey."

"Hey, y'all," she mocked. "Two days in Florida and…"

"It must be the sweet iced tea. I can't stop, it's fucking delicious."

"Yeah?" She teased, I sipped, smacking.

"Oh, yeah." I sank deeper in the worn wicker chair, closing my eyes to see and feel.

"So how is it? Tell me everything. Is the aesthetic similar to Madison?"

"Not exactly, there's some regional differences. But currently I'm all good. Warm breeze, house band on the patio, pineapple on my pizza, a carrot cupcake waiting…with my _sleeves rolled up_…"

"And what sorority house did you crash?"

"Ha. Don't you wish. No, I'm at Big Lou's Pizzeria. It's across from the courthouse, where I've been pulling fucking permits all day, after walking the periphery of the campus four times to acclimate."

"Aww. Poor professional Edward has to work and can't gape and flirt all day with the Southern honeys."

"Whoa. Listen to you. Feisty tonight."

"Mmmm."

"I also got stung by a bee at the hotel."

"Karma." She cleared her throat, dramatic.

"Thanks, babe. I love you too."

"You do?"

"Shut up."

"Say it again," she whined.

"No."

"Why not?"

"Because my waitress is tight, tan and blond and headed this way. They're like genetically engineered mermaids down here. Swear it."

"Oh my god. You're disgusting. And a pig. A disgusting pig. Oink."

"Relax… I tried to call your desk today."

"Today's Wednesday."

"So…"

"So, you left yesterday. Yesterday was Tuesday. Today's Wednesday."

"Bella?" She hummed through the Jeopardy theme. "Oh. Is that why I got stung by a bee?"

"Could be."

"You're so weird… and challenging. And weird."

"I was at _your_ desk."

"What?"

"When you called today. I heard Angela page me. But I was working in Auto-Cad and…"

"Is your program not working? You should call IT."

"It's working fine. I needed to borrow your super fancy Rotring 800."

"What does that have to do with using my computer and Auto-Cad?"

"Nothing."

"You have a Rotring 800 too, you know. I bought you one for graduation."

"Maybe I just wanted to use _yours_… at _your_ desk."

"You miss me. Don't you?"

"No."

"Liar."

"Yes. A little. A lot. A bunch."

"I knew it," I whispered, snapping and smirking. "I miss you too."

"I painted."

"Oh, Christ."

"Peter met me at this salvage yard during lunch. I found a door."

"Oh really. Peter did, did he?"

"Yes. He. Did. He's a good neighbor like that. Humph… anyway, wait. I know you're rolling your eyes right now. And I don't even care. Because I love this fucking door. And now it's painted but I need you to help me hang it… I mean I could do it, but the scale is off and…"

"Peter could do it."

"You're jealous."

"Damn fucking right, I'm jealous. Fuck this going to salvage yards with strange, elfin men while I'm across the country."

"You're not across the country. You're down south. And he's not elfin. He's just small boned. He has a small frame. Or something… I don't know, be nice. Tonight it might be a spider bite, jerk."

"You still need me though, don't you?"

"Whatever. And you don't like old stuff anyway."

"That's true. What color did you paint it?" I held my breath, wincing.

"Yam-ish. Like yam-esque. It looks like a yam shade. The shade of a yam." _Fuck._ "Are you cringing. I know you're cringing. Fuck you. You'll like it and you'll hang it and you'll smile. Okay?"

"Yep. But have you ever eaten a yam? Seriously."

"I'm nervous."

"Why? What's wrong?" I tensed, shifting as college cover tunes swelled to my left.

"The Sam Uley meeting tomorrow. You've never _not_ been there." _Baby_…

"Let's talk through it. Do you have the updates? Plans?"

"Yes. I'm covered in a blanket of them… I'm just ready to tear it all up and go again. I don't think the template is simple enough."

"It is. It's clean. Trust me. You did a timeless design."

"It's a fucking museum. It's not my place to over do. Honestly, I think I was irresponsible in the materials and…"

"Bella, stop. What's wrong with you? Why are you so insecure?" Silence, we waited through a painful pause. "Do I make you insecure?" She breathed, sighed. _I want to hold you so fucking bad. _"So maybe it's good that I'm away. That I'll be away for a while next time. Hmmm? Maybe I'm hand holding too much." I rolled my neck, running a rough hand through my hair, aggravated with it all. "It's a hard fought balance here, baby. I'm going to be honest."

"I don't want this to be hard."

"I don't mean it like that. But there's a lot to consider now."

"What? What do you mean?" Her anxiety was palpable.

"When I brought you in to Garret Paul… I knew our project collaboration would be easy. The Quileute job has unfolded so organically and smooth, Bella. We see things through the same vision, we really do. But I don't need to be dominating your professional possibilities. There's things only experience can teach. You know that. You should work with different project managers in these first years. While I'm gone you can build a base. Be wiser and more confident in your own designs."

"Are you breaking up with me?" _Godammit no._ _You are so fucking frustrating sometimes. _"I'm kidding. I hear you. I know. I know…"

"And I didn't call before now because you ignored me on Monday in the office and I could tell you needed some space… Have you talked to Brett?"

"No."

"I'm sorry."

"I'm down to only texting four times a day though, so that's progress in letting go."

"Oh fuck. Come on. He's a big boy. He'll get over it. You don't need to let go of anything. I'm not going anywhere, Bella."

"I don't want you to. But I miss you. And this is crazy."

"What's crazy? Talk to me."

"How I feel. What's between us. The years. The stuff… Now the sex. Work. The office. Just everything. I fucking can't sleep anymore when you're not here. And that's just gross and ridiculous and I hate it _and_ love it." I laughed, smug and grateful and exhausted.

"You know what I love?"

"Is it dirty? Tell me something dirty…"

"I love that you refer to a pen by its full commercial name. _The Rotring 800_."

"Yeah? Does that turn you on? Like architect porn."

"Completely."

"Come home."

"Soon."

~oo~S~oo~

Avoiding my stare, flustered, she shifted to take an active part. I fell back to ease the intensity. Days apart, the immediate future and its truth lingered. I leaned back and away at my desk while she engaged Mr. Paul with her final drawings over the drafting table. The design huddle grew louder, impressed with our progress. She took the accolades, I took the familiar nods of approval. My office cleared, the door falling closed, she stilled. "Hi, you." Shy, soft and still unsure, she twisted the loop between her fingers, spinning to drop it over the table. "I wanted to pick you up at O'Hare. But then I started reviewing these and …" I stalked closer, she spun towards the table, focused on the window above. "I've got to get back to..." I moved behind. "Back to my... office. _My_ office..." Her fingers splayed over piles of blueprints. I pressed closer, gently melting, her head reactively tipped back against my shoulder. She released a grateful giggle, sighing deep. "What are we doing? What do you want?"

Breathing deep, courageous and honest, I centered. "I want to kiss you, suck you, taste and tease you until you're begging me to fuck you." I dusted her thick waves over her shoulder, wrapping a strong arm around her middle. "I want to push into you slow at first… just... the tip." A faint gasp morphed to a moan. "And when I'm finally buried deep inside you I'll move so slow … so fucking slow that we can hardly bear it." Her nails dug at my thighs, bracing behind and finally, she exhaled a ragged breath. "I want to fuck you hard and fast, on the bed, against the wall … I want to make you scream... I want you Bella, I want it all… and I'm so _goddamn_ tired of fighting about how we're going to do this."

"Are you being serious right now? Because I can't fucking feel my legs and…" She spun, wide eyed, trembling. Our smirks spread, I winked.

Her leather bag fell barely inside the door, she rushed ahead. I locked and followed a trail, cabled cashmere, dark patented belt. She braced against the spindle slipping her second tall, leather boot off and away.

I pressed close behind, pushing hair forward to savor her bare neck. Brushing my late day, long traveled stubble over her sensitive skin, she shivered. I slid the zipper down the back of her silk dress, tracing my fingers up. A pinch, unclasp, further up to push her black lace bra from creamy shoulders.

Lips found my neck, I held her tighter to me. I slipped into the satin at her hips, sliding through her soft curls. She moaned into my throat, melting, moving, as I teased her clit. She licked, nipped and whispered her want. "What you said in the office…"

I smoothed up, gliding over her torso, her breasts. Thumbing over peaked nipples, I squeezed gentle. "You want that? Hmmm?"

"Yes… yes… More…" She breathed, blowing deep to steady.

"Don't move."

I quickly undressed, shirt, dress pants, boxers, admiring her soft curves, shoulders to hips to ass. Forward and towards, one hand firm at her hip, the other pushed her panties down. Parted lips dusted across and down her back.

"Just like this… I want to feel you from behind, baby."

"Oh, fuck," she whimpered, pressing back, my hard cock trapped between us as she lowered to the bed. I teased her pussy, sliding between her warm, smooth thighs. She fisted the duvet, peeking back and over. Our gaze never parted as I stroked forward, she spread wider. "Mmmm, Edward…"

Deep, deeper, I fucked her from behind. Fingers gripped, dug as I thrust to set a steady rhythm. "Fuck, that's good." Her hand lingered between her thighs to push herself higher. "That's it…"

I felt the tightening, the sensation forcing too soon. Her moaning edged the quiet, still evening, she pulsed, driving my orgasm too. We collapsed, wrapped, burning, sweet and heady. Falling beside, I tugged and rolled her in tight.

Her tender mouth, breath and lips brought me present, absolute and spent. "Never, ever, ever…"

"Never what?" I dragged us up, nestling over the tucked, still made bed.

"That… good." She blinked, love drunk, heavy eyes. "_Fuck_."

"You've got a dirty mouth." I pinched her swollen lips together. She wrinkled her nose, wiggling free.

"Me? Really?" A cocked brow, I lifted her above me. Her slight weight and warmth, revved and stirred my soul again. "Do you talk like that to all your ladies?"

"I've only got one."

"Now."

"Don't start the smack talking." I squeezed, trapping, she wrestled.

"Brett alluded to lots." _Jesus. Here we go. _"I mean, I have a right to know, don't I?"

"What do you want to know? I'm thirty two years old. I've dated my fair share of women in college, in grad school, in Madison, in Chicago."

"How many times have you been in love? Like truly, awed and fucked over in love."

"Once."

"Bullshit. I bet at least five. Jennifer was the last?" She nodded, I sighed. _You're impossible._

"I wasn't in love with her," I mumbled, admitting a pathetic truth, shaking my head. "I wasn't." Bella gasped, righting, straddling.

"You almost married her, Edward."

"No, I didn't. Brett wanted me to. He wanted me to marry her and buy the house next to them and drink beer in the garage and go to Badger games every Saturday. I was in love with someone else." My hands found her thighs, I smoothed up, gripping tighter as I went.

"Who?" She nibbled her lip, a smile teasing. I sat to meet. Strong hands held her face near, barely a breath between.

"You know who." Lips brushed. "You know exactly who I couldn't take my fucking eyes off. You know who I'd talk to late at night, guiding through all her fucking melodramatic milestones. You know who…"

"You've loved me a long time…" She whispered, light with a kiss. "And now you're leaving me." _Christ, woman_. I knocked my forehead against hers, tossing her over, playful. I hovered, a conscious effort to control. The moment slowed. She traced my brows, down my nose, my cheekbones, I pressed my lips along her wrist. "Remember that girl you brought to my dorm room?"

"Rosalie?" I asked, but knew. She pointed, eyes rolling. "I also brought your favorite spicy cheeto… frito things too, don't forget. Didn't I bring you a whole bag of groceries?"

"Yes. That was her. With the huge, amazing tits. Oh my god."

"Not as good as yours…" I leaned, tasting, swirling, hoping to divert and go again.

"Wait, wait…" She giggled, twisting. "Remember, I kept calling her Rose Lee instead. And she was so irritated."

"Why are you bringing her up? Your mind is everywhere, all the time."

"I don't know. Maybe it's a curse for knowing you too long, through it all."

"I've had to endure all your fine choices too. Knowing you could do better."

"Better? Like you?" I nodded, grinding to remind. "Mmmm," she whimpered, tilting to offer. "The best for last."

"Is it?"

"I want it to be. So much…"

"Baby." Wild, pure emotion surged. I held, soaking in her tired, honest smile. Suddenly, her hand smacked my bare ass. "That was the day you defaced my fake ID. You creep. I was so pissed and embarrassed." I fell next to her laughing. "Fucking asshole." She shoved, I caught angry hands, sucking fingertips. "You drew a goddamn mustache on my fake ID face. Who does that?"

"Me."

"You." A narrowed eye, a firm pump and stroke below, we tested and touched.

"You want more. You ready?"

"Slower this time."

"Yeah…"

~oo~S~oo~

That hateful tone and menace vibrated too far from the floor. Bella stayed tucked warm and drooling in the bend of my elbow. I shifted, reaching and feeling through my slacks pocket. "Yeah. Hello?"

"It's Brett. I can't find her. She's there?" _What the hell… what time is it? _

"She's here. What's wrong?"

"There was an accident." His tone was calm, confusing. I rubbed furiously over tired eyes, anxious to focus. My heart raced, vulnerable in the early morning hour.

"Shit. Who? What happened?" I forced through the sleepy fog. Bella sighed, sleepy and twisting. I held her closer, warm... in my arms, my heart.

"Dad. He fell from a ten foot ladder at work. We're at St. Mary's still stuck in emergency."

"Is he conscious? What're they saying? Jesus, Brett."

"They did a scan. They want to observe. He's conscious, bitching about going home."

"Is everyone there?"

"Bethie's home. She was feeling nauseous. Now I'm worried about that too. But Emmett and Ben are here."

"I'll wake Bella up and we'll start out." He sighed, I sensed his tensing.

"Just wait. Don't wake her. She's going to freak out and be spastic and Dad needs to rest and be quiet."

"She will freak out, you're right about that. Listen, Brett…" Distance and fear offered immediate perspective.

"Don't, man."

"Brett, this is happening."

"Obviously."

"You don't give her enough credit. She's so much more than you realize."

"Will you fucking stop. I practically raised my sister. Don't tell me how and who she is. Dammit. Just… I mean, is this something I need to worry about? If you fucking hurt her, so help me…"

"I'm not going to hurt her. Ever. You know I wouldn't. It's… it's not perfect. She's in a very insecure space right now."

"That's because of Mom. That'll never change."

"Maybe. And I get that. I do. And I'll be traveling a lot this year. But she's wiser and more capable that you've seen lately. I know she needs to grow…"

"Fucking exactly. So why are you filling her head and tying her down now?"

"We're letting it unfold, Brett. I'm not forcing her into anything. I wouldn't. I want this to be authentic. Trust me."

"I want to, man. I really want to believe this. To fucking trust you."

"Give us a chance. She needs us both. And I don't need your pansy ass fist near my jaw anymore."

"Shit. You deserved that. How is that smug mug of yours anyway? Did I leave a reminder?"

"Naw. My mug is still better looking than yours and that's what really bothers you at the end of the day."

"Whatever. I'll call you two loser lovers back. Emmett wants B here. But just wait."

"Let us know. I'll bring her. I'll do anything you guys need." I tossed the phone, let the words settle. Gathering her tighter, I kissed her forehead, leaving the peace before her panic.

_**a/n**_

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	10. ten

_**ten.**_

"Charlie, I was just about to call." I hit speaker on the cell, balanced on my knee and knotted my tie.

"Did you make it in yet?" he wondered.

"Yes. I'm actually riding shotgun in a packed taxi as we speak." I smirked, too anxious to give a shit about the audience. "Headed away from O'Hare."

"Well, Brett's got the goods. He'll meet you there." _The mad messenger. _"I had the stone tightened and the whole thing cleaned this week."

"Hey, Charlie... you didn't have to do that."

"No. It needed it. And... I've got a lot of time on my hands now, you know."

"You deserve the rest and retirement. You and Sue should take a trip." A tired sneer and sigh from the crowded back seat full of strangers finally forced me off speaker.

"We'll be going over to Southbend to watch Emmett play soon enough. Will you guys get over there too?"

"Definitely. Still can't believe he's at Notre Dame."

"Yeah, well, we all blame you, Edward."

"I hear you. I hear you... I've also been hearing Bella loud and ridiculous over it too. But it's all good." Friendly yet nervous chuckling, the moment almost heavy in heightened knowing. A father, a daughter, a gift and me... prepared and onward. "Thank you, Charlie," I offered quiet, staring at the late Friday freeway stretch. The Quileute Museum and Library minutes ahead.

"I was thinking on it this morning. It's definitely circa 1970's and I probably paid less than two hundred dollars for it, Edward. You sure?"

"I'm sure. It's worth everything."

~oo~S~oo~

Deep summer stillness punished as I stood, awed and proud on the outside. The essence and expanse of the completed structure still amazed me. She'd rode it out, seen it through, created and built her forever first. _You did it, baby. _ An obnoxious, familiar whistle and a throat clearing left me spinning, heart racing.

"What the fuck, man?" I scolded my oldest, closest friend strutting toward me in the hazy, hot dusk.

"Why are you loitering out here? Shouldn't you be running in there, sweeping her up and throwing her over your shoulder?" He egged, I glared.

"I'll do that soon. And more later." I punched a smug arched brow warning. "I'm admiring her work from the exterior and catching my goddamn breath, you nosy prick. I've been traveling covert and shit all day to pull this off."

"Well aren't you just fucking James Bond and whatever," he spat stupid, I shook, eyes narrowed. "It's better out here, anyway. The food sucks. Just a bunch of fancy finger stuff. No beer." Brett heaved, nodded and settled on a metal bench near the entrance. I fell near, loosening and unbuttoning the top of my white dress shirt.

"How is she?"

"Making the rounds. Being prissy. Talking a lot. Like a lot. More than usual. If that's fucking possible. I don't know." We smirked, laughing light. He picked and tossed smooth river pebbles in the bed beneath our feet. "Grown up. Professional. Fancy. Beautiful. Smart. All that shit she's supposed to be. So fucking grown up… Jesus." Lost, reserved, I let him settle.

"That'll be Bree one day," I mumbled, he grinned proud.

"Yeah. Probably so. You saw the pictures of the lake house, right? Her first swimsuit. You know Bella's spending all your money on my daughter, right?"

"That's how it should be."

He stood. "So you're doing this, huh?"

"I'm doing this." I righted, smoothing my suit jacket. "I love her, Brett."

"I know you do." He dug, rooting in his front pocket. "I guess you'll need this then." He palmed a small fabric pouch and promise. I reached, he pulled back. _Fucker. _ I grabbed him, hard into a man to man, brother to brother embrace. "Don't you dare fuck this up, Edward."

"Go home, Brett. You've got a long drive." I smacked his skeptical, loving mug and winked. "I'll take it from here."

~oo~S~oo~

She shifted, arm tucked under the other, wine glass tipping, oblivious. Thin, blue silk slid easy over the curve of her ass. A game, silent and fun I hung in the shadows of soaring ceilings, solid wood beams, replicas and native treasures. She mingled, head thrown, laugh loud. But her shoulders, stance ever and always curled slight and self preserved. _You're doing great. And fuck I missed you. _A toast, sudden and startling began in the corner. I snagged a tall glass flute and snuck closer.

Sam Uley bragged and thanked, nodding her way often. She beamed, nibbled and breathed deep. Her bare summer specked shoulders glistened and trembled slight. Other mentions over soft colloquial songs rambled on, then he noticed my hovering. I straightened, cringing at being found. "And there's Edward Cullen, also from the Garrett Paul design firm hiding humbly over there…" She gasped, stomped, her hand flew to cover glossy moving lips. Applause and acknowledgements swelled as she rushed my way.

Arms tugged tight, damp, dark eyes wondering how and when, she whimpered, tucking closer. "You asshole." She slugged, fisting my lapel.

"Don't make a scene."

"I will if I want. You surprised me. I don't like surprises." _Ha._ _Just wait, baby. _ "Oh my god. I love you. You know that? This is just crazy. Look at me. You look tired. Awful and tired. But so perfect and yummy. Fuck." I smiled and kissed over and against. Subtly guiding her backwards along the periphery.

"You look beautiful. And this building is beautiful."

"Really?" She lit up, sincere. "You haven't seen it in months."

"I haven't seen _you_ in months. Let me look." We breathed, stared. Coy and silly, she hid behind bare fingers, peeking between two.

"Knock it off." She sucked back the last of her wine and gestured across the main hall. I followed, blood pounding, cock twitching. She stumbled backwards into a dark conference room. Mouths, tongues, hands wanting, too many weeks and too much distance fueled the frenzy.

I trapped her against a long table in the center of the room. New moonlight shined through tall, clear windows. "How long?" she whispered, peppering love up and along my stubbled jaw.

"How long what?" I lifted her to sit, she reactively spread her legs. I smoothed the silk up, exposing.

"How long do I get you home this time?"

"I'm done." I winked, smirked smug. I shrugged from my jacket, feeling over the inside pocket and contents to reassure.

"Edward…" She pulled, squeezed. "Fucking finally. I'm so…" Pinching her chin, fingers firm, I tipped her head back, lips trailing down. "Mmmm…" My thumb dusted over her mouth to hush. She tongued and tasted, nibbling and teasing.

"Are these new?" I smirked, whispered. Her fingers curled tight along the edge of the blond maple table.

"Yes. Yes... yes." She shook, stray hair spilling, damp from August heat. I slid pale, blue lace down, off, away. Dressy heels dangled.

"You weren't going to save them for me?"

"Yes," she giggled, breathy, guilty and lying. "I mean, I don't know. Sure, of course. Surprise! New pretty things just for you, baby!" Reaching, she tugged my loose tie desperate. "You weren't supposed to be... You know. I'm just... Come back up here."

I stroked to start, fingers dipping, she palmed soft along the inside of her own warm thighs. "I want to be down here..."

"No, no, yes... Stay there..." Two pushing tight, I slid my tongue up and along. "Goddamn, I've missed you, and this. Lock the door. Did we lock the door… Oh fuck, yes…"

Her eyes fluttered closed, she inhaled sharp, her body tensed. I stroked her clit softly with my tongue, she arched towards. "Shhhh…"

"Fuck." Soft moans and want for more filled the space. I slipped and worked my fingers deeper, my tongue teased, lips sucked. She knotted through my hair, pulling me closer, heel digging as I drew out the sensations. "Take me home, Edward. I need more… more. Fuck… now."

~oo~S~oo~

Sated yet sleepless, I fumbled in the darkness anxious to settle into our space again. Ours. More so than ever. I poured empty wine gifted and sent home in celebration of the project end. Hers was built and done, mine was designed and prepped. I watched her dream from the bedroom door. Leaning, yawning, travel tired, but mindful and hopeful of what happened next. She nested in sex warmed sheets and wild, mussed hair, my love and energy in rare rest. _And these fucking freshly painted purple walls. What the ever loving fuck… 'but, baby, they're the best shade level of aubergine…' The death of me. You will be. _Irresistible, I left a soft kiss on her forehead and slumped silent at my drafting table. Scattered piles of my old sketchbooks and stacks of new prints covered every inch. "Hey…" She stirred, sitting. "You okay? What time is it?"

"Late," I mumbled, paging through her new work.

"Do you like?" she whispered, dusting lips over my shoulder, down my arm and dark ink. I nodded, meeting her eyes. She tucked naked into my lap, resting a sleepy, heavy head against my bare chest.

"Children's Hospital expansion project, right? I swear you have the best spatial instincts."

She sighed, light fingertips feathered through my hair below. "I do, don't I?" She teased, I pinched smooth skin inside her thigh. "Oh, mmmm, I missed you… there."

"Yeah?" I cupped, angled her face towards mine, brushing lips. "Didn't I take care of that, already?"

"I guess so… But I also missed you here…" She danced and wiggled fingers between her breasts. I kissed, inhaled. "And here…" She rolled her nipple gently, I followed, licking.

"You're still horny? So insatiable. I can't keep up."

"That's right, old man."

"Hey. Who are you calling old?" I tested, lightly smacking, pinching her ass.

"Hey," she mocked, narrowed eyes. "That ass you like to rub will always be eight years younger and firmer than yours."

"Ah, I see how it is." She gnashed and nibbled the end of my nose.

"But really and seriously… since we're awake…" she smirked naughty, licking lips.

"What's up with my sketchbooks? Hmmm?" I wondered, she shrugged and pursed pouting lips.

"Sometimes I miss you. Really bad. Late at night… And I look through these. I know I'm hopeless…" _You're perfect. _

"I have something for you."

"It can't beat the flamingo riding Santa snow globe you brought last time."

"Here." I opened the brochure. "Door County. Best B and B I could find. You and me. Seventy two hours and you can wear me out any way you want to." I winked, she squealed and snuggled around tight.

"Edward, this is perfect." She straddled, ready again. _Jesus, Bella. Let me get through this. But goddamn your pussy is so fucking… No. Nope, I'm doing this first._

"Wait… wait, baby. I have something else." I scooted her off and went for my suit jacket. She put on my wrinkled dress shirt and hurried behind. I gripped the future tight in my palm and tugged her back in my lap on the chilled, leather sofa.

"What's this?" She peeled my fingers away, our eyes locked, she knew. "Edward." The tapestry pouch was as it always was. Stitched by my mother for hers… only after. Bella shook, sniffled slightly. I held her closer, suddenly unsure.

"Hey. Hey…"

"No. No… no." She smiled, brave through immediate tears, letting Renee's ring fall into her hand. "How…"

"Charlie… then Brett… and…" Speechless. I felt for the very first, ever, watching her watch me. We burst, anxious, impulsive laughter.

"I don't… I mean… What… what, why are you…"

"I love you."

"I know," she whispered, nodding, wide eyed, waiting. I slipped the ring on and down. Thumbing over the single sapphire stone, along the gold and silver toned thin filigree band. She stroked my cheek. "But what does this mean?" She shouted wild, giggling, kicking bare feet.

"It means... It means whatever you want it to mean." We stared through a new, weighted moment. Our hands tight, her fingers wiggled. She prompted, waiting, with big, hopeful eyes.

"You want to marry me..." She whispered, a slight, almost silly taunt. I nodded and shrugged, intentionally nonchalant to tease. "Say it." She climbed over me, straddling again, hands framing my face to steady. "Say it. Say it. Say it." I turned in her grip, dragging my mouth along the inside of her wrist. _You're mine. All. Complete. Beautiful. Soft. Wild. Finally. _I smirked, she narrowed damp eyes, mouthing, frustrated. "Say it."

Gripping sudden and swift beneath my favorite ass, I pulled her closer, tighter. "Marry me."

_beauty of form arising from balanced proportions, symmetry defined._

_the end._

**_a/n_**

**_They made it. We made it. And you guys made it perfect. Thank you for reading xo_**

**_Love, thanks, hugs to the best obsmama, carenl, ffpassion xx_**

**_Kisses and thanks to the mad, creative talent ange_de_lube for her gorgeous graphics xx _**

**_This is important... www. katalina. fandomcause. info _**

**_We have a final future peek planned for the lovers next week ;) Excited!_**

**_We're so grateful for your notes, your recs, your tweets and the fun. Love you guys xxoo_**


	11. Epilogue

_**epilogue.**_

_**from edward. **_

"Oh god. Yes. Fuck. Yes." Head thrown back, her hair grazed my knees. Thighs pressed tight, her nails dug deep into the leather behind. I cringed, she rocked, rode.

"Baby, let's…" I whispered, she narrowed dark, determined eyes.

"You're joking, right?" She panted. I nipped along her jaw, tightened my chilled grasp at her hips to slow. "This car isn't even new anymore. Fuck. Right there…" Breathless, she moved faster, wild and needy. Tongue tasting, I peppered soft at her throat, up her neck. She slid quick hands from the leather into my hair. _And thank you._ "We're going to need a bigger one anyway…"

"Then we should protect it for resale." I tugged her tender nipple with gentle teeth to tease.

"I can't. Get. Enough…" _No kidding. Hormone overload._ _A lesser man… _"And it's so damn good." She bounced faster, she won. I settled back, watching, marveling, pacing and pushing up. My cock dragged against her clit with every pass and press.

The lake rippled in December wind beyond the fogged windows. Her thick cream cable and cashmere hung open, dark tights and plaid wool scattered the dash. _You're so fucking beautiful. _Desperate fingers splayed seeking balance on the car interior roof. "Don't hurt yourself."

"Shut… up… Edward. Fuck, I'm so close, baby."

"I love making you come." Brushing my stubbled chin across her bare chilled chest, I sucked the other nipple into my mouth. She peaked, grasped tight. Familiar heat coursed, I thrust once, then again, selfish and spent. "Goddamn…"

She fell, sighing content. Sated giggles, we clung close, lips tasted, loved over my skin as I trailed slow, soft fingers down her back. "Thank you."

"Thank _you_."

"I know you don't need it as much as I do."

"I always need it… you."

"Do you think I'll be this horny the whole time? Can you imagine?" _No. And fuck. I need to start working out more._ She stroked light, my cock twitched. _Great._ "I guess I shouldn't do that," she purred. "We're going to miss the show. Where are my tights? I'm freezing. I mean you always make me hot, baby." Silly, quick pecks down my nose, she shifted, climbing and straightening. "But what do you think… it must be like twenty out there? Come on. We need to hurry and go. We can't be late for Miss B's first Nutcracker."

"I see how this is." I buttoned and pinched the bare ass struggling to situate. "Just use me for a quick and dirty lay by the lake." She froze, breathed, bit and licked her bottom lip. _Oh shit. _

"Mmmm. Fuck. Don't talk like that. Oh my god, Edward."

"Simmer down, mama…"

~oo~S~oo~

We fell into worn, amber velvet theater seats, silent and avoiding. Beth blew kisses in the dark of the aging downtown venue. Brett glared with daggered, familiar eyes. "You're late," he mouthed down the row. "I don't even want to know."

"Sorry. Shhhh…" Bella calmed, flashing sweetness, batting mock innocence. We winked, lacing hands over her still flat tummy. Bree shuffled across the stage, clumsy and pink and waving frantic happiness at us. "She's perfect. Look at her. Sweetest six year old ever. Gorgeous girl."

I spotted Emmett and Chelsea huddled in a far corner. He was wrapped close around his young, blond fiancé from behind. I nudged Bella to see and notice. She awed and smiled with damp eyes. Surrounded by her favorites, she squeezed our hands tighter. I stroked loose fingers over her stomach, knowing, loving.

Lights up and late, we celebrated Bree over red velvet cupcakes next door. Snuggled in Bella's lap then mine, she told and retold how Charlie and Sue were seeing Santa across the country. Intent and proud, she focused and listened. I was lost in her glow. Brett piled treats, cocoa and coffee on pulled and matched tables. "Is there decaf?"

"Since when do you drink decaf, Bella?" Brett wondered, forever annoyed, always curious. Her hesitation was humorous.

"It's late. I'm tired and I need rest to wrap all the presents I brought for this one." She tickled, Bree squealed.

"So you guys are coming tomorrow to look at wedding shit, right?" Emmett mumbled with a mouthful of sugar.

"You cussed, Uncle Emmett. That's gross."

"Yeah. Of course. So excited for you guys," Bella gushed, beaming over and across to Chelsea chatting with Beth. "Is that a new…" she gestured, rubbing over her own brow, wondering.

"Yeah. New piercing. Hot right?" Emmett grinned smug. _Who would have ever imagined._

"No, yeah… it's totally great. She's her own girl. Owning that unique vibe she's got going on… I love it." Bella leaned to kiss his cheek, resting her head and tangled nest of hair against his overly muscled arm. "God. Mom would have loved her."

"Really?" Emmett whispered.

"She really would've." I nodded.

~oo~S~oo~

"So this place is crazy cool and cute. Look!" Chelsea hurried ahead towards the white shaker church. Peeling, lonely and quaint, it sat alone in a winter dead meadow of nothing. "And it's for sale. But the Pastor dude, said of course he'd take the sign down during the ceremony. I don't know… I really kinda like it. What do you guys think?" Bella stilled. Her red rubber boots stuck, long hair whipped, her mouth hung open and slight.

"Edward…" she whispered. I brushed her temple with my lips, lingering.

"I know."

"Come on. Come on guys. You'll die inside," Chelsea shouted, waving. _Goddamn._ _She reminds me of you, younger and loose. _We followed eager, freezing and hopeful. A stoic Pastor Banner showed the space. Chelsea nodded, hyper and happy, a close talker who hugs. Emmett left a secure, steady hand on her ass constant and obvious. _I feel you man. I do. Those days_. _But fuck, it only gets better. _

Bella and I drifted from the noise. Shadows shifted and peeked from natural noonday light. We followed a narrow staircase. Painted hardwood floors and original molding balanced the second floor. We moved slow, hands held across the singular open space. I stomped and touched through the center with my leather boot to test. "Knee wall? Or full?" Bella smirked, serious.

"Depends." I measured mentally.

"Excellent midday light. Jesus." She ran dancing fingers down the groves of the fluted window molding. Is this still considered Dane County?"

"Yep." Building codes and taxes filled my head. "This is totally unexpected. Fuck." I shook. The worn floor creaked as she stepped slow back towards me.

"_Unexpected_. Like everything else…" She smiled honest, eyes light and wide. I pulled her close. Cupping her face with one hand, dusting her belly with the other.

"Everything." Thumbing over her pale rose lips, I kissed her forehead.

"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" She puckered, tasting my thumb.

"I'm totally thinking what you're thinking. And fuck. I'd love to hear you moaning my name in these vintage rafters." We burst, she squeezed my denim covered ass.

"Now who's horny? Wait!" She pointed dramatic. "Did you see the windows are double hung and spectacular?"

"Yeah? I got your hung and spectacular…" I joked, forcing her hand over my growing front.

"Mmmm… We need to do something about that. Should we make an offer on this first?" We kissed, soft and again.

"I think…" I stepped back, one step, then another. Liberated in the structural possibility, high and determined in our nexts, I dragged her palm across my mouth. "I think we should."

~oo~S~oo~

Hands gently squeezed my thighs, warmth surrounded my cock. New early light and a gasp, groan forced my eyes open. A devious curl and smirk turned in the corner of her very full, very busy mouth. Her tongue slid up my length, pausing at the tip. "Good morning." My head fell back, my hips pressed up. _Fuck. Yes._ She wrapped her hand at the base, then up and teasing.

Swirling, sliding and down, her mouth worked me over. I tangled tight through her sleep mussed waves as she set a steady pace. The heat pumped sudden and through, straight to my cock. "Yeah, baby." _You suck me so damn good._ Her grip harder over my thigh, nails bit and dug as she licked and moved. "Fuck."

I tipped, let go and came, her hum vibrating against me. I stilled, watching as her tongue finished what it started. She swallowed, brow arched and peeked. "Merry Christmas." She smirked, we laughed loud, cathartic.

"Come here, you." She crawled seductive, slow, nipping, nibbling along the way up. "Bring that sweet pussy up here. I need to reciprocate. Season of giving and all that…"

"No. Nope." She straddled, shaking a naughty finger side to side. "You can't. Cannot do _that_ anymore."

"What the hell are you talking about?" I stroked tender between her legs. Lashes fluttered, she couldn't fight.

"The book says so." She nodded, licking lips, melting around my fingers. She gestured near the bed. I glanced. "Edward…" I slowed my teasing, dragging a path from her wet pussy around her nipples to her parted mouth. "Is this real?" She puckered over each fingertip. "Are we seriously doing this? Buying that property?"

I settled an arm, elbow back and under my head, we stared. "I was thinking maybe we should get married in it first, then buy it, then renovate it."

"You want to marry me?"

"Didn't we cover this like six or so years ago?" Wide eyed sarcasm and a nose pinch left her giggling. "Besides, I don't need Brett all over my ass about knocking up his sister and not marrying her." She scoffed, leaped up dramatic. Standing bare and beautiful in the center of the small bed towering over my sorry, sated self.

"You fucking told him." She accused loud and wild.

"Easy killer." I laughed, running my palm up the inside of her leg, her knee, her warm, soft thigh. "Lay down. Christ. No. I didn't tell him. I'm not facing your hormonal wrath."

"Don't you dare make fun of me. I'm in a fragile state." She pouted, tucking in close again.

"Shhh… relax." I flipped to hover, kissing her chin, her cheek, her tiny secret scar.

"Mmmm. Right there is good though…" She pointed, directed my soft trail of soothing. "Don't patronize me either. That pisses me off with the fire of a thousand deserts."

"Suns," I mumbled against her throat.

"What?"

"Suns. With the fire of a thousand suns. That's the saying."

"No it's not."

"Yes. It. Is."

"The desert is hot. There can be fire there."

"Please be quiet." I worked down, sucking, licking, tasting. Perfect pink nipples, the dip and curve of her hip, I paused over her belly, breathing deep.

"You love her. Don't you? I want to see her right now." A wave, a warmth, simple words suddenly made it so real.

"I do. I love him so much." I rested easy, my cheek pressed. Bella traced along my ear, sighing, peace.

"It's snowing. Look…" We did, we watched through her childhood bedroom window, soaking in the new. A new snow. A new relationship. A new path.

"Thank you for taking Mom to midnight Mass last night," I whispered.

"It was perfect. She was good. She's lonely though, baby."

"I know."

"We could be here for her. In that new place."

"It's not new, Bella. It'd be a lot of work. You realize that." She bent her knees around me and scratched strong through my hair.

"So. So what. I want it. I want that space. I want to live there with you and be happy and be near everyone."

"Full time. Like all the time, here?" I propped, meeting her anxious nod. "Leave Garrett Paul? Leave the city?"

"I think so," she mouthed, cringing. "She…" Bella rubbed my hand across her stomach. "She's making me rethink the entire fucking world. I'm just… It's just…" I scooted up to meet. Dusting over her mouth, a kiss to reassure.

"It's okay. We've been working nonstop. We can take a break. The pregnancy is still so new and… "

"But not a break. I want to settle. Daddy's getting older. Your mom can't find a balance… Emmett's getting married, Bree's precious and Brett's going to make her nuts and shoot her boyfriends."

"Bella, re…" She pinched my lips together, twisting tight.

"Do not patronize me and my feelings. If I want to move home to Madison and renovate that fucking church and raise and nurture our babies in it then that's what we're fucking doing. Got it?" I nodded, gnashing free, nudging my erection at her thigh. _I'll do anything, go anywhere you fucking want, baby. _"And did you say _him_? That you love _him_? Because this amazing thing we've made is a her and she's going to be the next commissioner of the WNBA."

"Or he might be the next brilliant Frank Lloyd Wright," I teased.

"True. She could be that…" She winked, we smirked against each other's lips. I pulled her closer, sliding my tongue down her neck, over her quickening pulse. Pushing my thigh between hers, she stoked up my arms, making lazy swirls over the ink.

"God, I love the taste of your skin." I nipped her chin, tongue teasing, I framed her face.

"Kiss me sweet." Unhurried, soft, we savored. She skimmed warm hands over my bare ass, I thumbed over her cheekbones. We sighed, swayed over the sheets and smiled.

"Can I make love to you, now? Or does the book say…"

"No. That's good. In fact, it recommends more frequent lovemaking than before…"

"Oh, it does, does it? Well, I think we've got that covered." I leaned, pressing my mouth above the swell of her breast. She arched, pushing tighter against me. I tasted her nipple, licking, teasing across the peak.

"Edward… please." Hands skimmed down shivering sides, her hips met mine, searching for friction. I hovered, positioned and wrapped her leg around my thigh. Slowly pushing forward, I worked gentle with shallow thrusts.

"Fuck you feel…" I stroked deeper, resting my forehead at her shoulder. "You feel amazing." Familiar, set and so, we tipped and rocked our own rhythm. She whimpered as we slid and I whispered love.

She forced my stare, bringing my mouth to hers, adrenaline and high emotion. She nipped my lower lip. "I love you so much." Together, faster, closer, legs tightened around my waist. She pulled her mouth from mine, she shook, her head moved side to side and again, frantic. "More… harder… faster."

"That's it… Tell me…" Warmth rushed, she gasped, I paced how she begged. "Fuck, baby… yeah…" I shuddered and came, she moaned. "I… goddamn, I love you, Bella." _Always. Always…_

**_a/n_**

**_Thank you for reading and taking the journey xx_**

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**_And so it goes for the beautiful, creative Midwest lovers... a new baby, a new home, forever love. _**

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